Personal testimony about the struggle to come out as gay in a society in which it is stigmatised was at the heart of disgusted reaction by European Union leaders to a discriminatory Hungarian law this week.
It mattered that gay people were in the room. The heated confrontation of Hungary began at a meeting of European affairs ministers in Luxembourg last week, in which at least two participants – France's Clément Beaune and Germany's Michael Roth – were themselves gay.
The encounter was described as passionate. As was a meeting of prime ministers some days later in Brussels, in which the standout intervention came from Luxembourg's Xavier Bettel.
He explained to Hungary's leader Victor Orban that he was born gay.
“I did not become gay. I am, it is not a choice,” he said, according to sources present, before describing the struggle to come out to his parents, and the sense of stigma that still affected him. Many young LGBT people took their own lives, he said. “This is very bad. This is stigmatising.”
Momentum for change
When Bettel took power in 2013, he was only the third openly gay head of government in the world, four years after the first – Iceland's Johanna Sigurdardottir – and two years after Elio Di Rupo in Belgium.
The importance of personal testimony in persuasion reflected in some ways Ireland’s campaign for marriage equality in 2015.
At that time, Micheál Martin spoke of the importance of gay men and women telling their stories in driving the momentum for change.
Now as taoiseach, Martin's contribution to the discussion in Brussels centred on another personal experience. He conveyed the story of Louth teenager Ruairí Holohan to the other EU leaders, using the young man's experience of bullying to explain how a law that equated being gay with paedophilia would have severe repercussions for young people in school.
The repressive government of Viktor Orban has toyed with the red lines of other EU member states for many years as he has enriched his cronies with their tax money, suppressed the free media and harassed independent civil society groups in a campaign to solidify power.
Pushed too far
An attitude of acquiescence, optimism and awareness that Hungarian society may yet elect a new government had long forestalled reaction. But a combination of factors conspired to create a situation in which Orban pushed things too far.
One is the looming prospect of the EU's distribution of Covid-19 economic stimulus funds. Countries including the Netherlands have raised the alarm that the money could be used to further entrench Orban's power.
Another factor is that Hungary has severely tried the patience of fellow member states by repeatedly blocking joint EU resolutions on subjects such as supporting the democracy of Hong Kong, preventing the bloc from condemning Beijing's crackdown on its freedoms.
Crucially, Orban's Fidesz party left the European People's Party – the EU's largest group in which Fine Gael sits – earlier this year. This has left the Hungarian government more isolated than it has ever been.