Tips for a stress-free family holiday: Write packing lists and don’t be afraid to do things separately

Fail to prepare. Prepare to fail. Never has a mantra rung as true as it does when preparing to take the family on holiday. From the military planning that goes into packing, to carefully considered seating arrangements for travel so there’s no international incident between siblings at 40,000 feet, the finer details can make all the difference.

But fear not, having recently taken to the skies to bring our seven kids to the Canary Islands, I have all the tips you’ll need to make sure your family holiday goes as smoothly as possible – with a little help from Irish Times readers, too.

Packing

Write lists and pack light. A list means you can keep tabs on what’s packed and what’s still to be added to the cases. Pack early if you can. Mix and match clothes and shoes, and be realistic about how many outfits you’ll really need. That’s easier said than done of course if you’ve got small children, but bear in mind the type of holiday you’re taking. If it’s a sun break and you’re likely to spend lots of it by the pool or beach, then you and the kids are also likely to spend most of the time in your swimming togs, so there’s no need for endless outfits. And don’t forget your chargers and adaptors.

Important documents

Make sure you have all your important documents to hand – and though it seems obvious, check that your passport is in date.

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If you’re travelling within Europe, don’t forget (as I did) to make sure you have a EHIC card for every member of the family. If you only realise close to departure date that you don’t have these, contact your local HSE health centre and ask about getting a temporary one, which can usually be arranged pretty quickly.

Don’t forget any prescription medications, and the prescription or note from the doctor.

En route

Bring a small backpack for each child. Include lots of things to distract them en route to your destination. Snacks, colouring books and crayons, books and mini travel games are all great. Or download movies or favourite programmes ahead of travelling to family devices. But don’t forget the earphones or headphones – your fellow passengers won’t thank you if you leave them behind.

Travel cushions can help make those early morning and late night journeys a lot more comfortable.

If you’re flying, it’s also worth bringing lollipops, or something the children can suck on in case they’re bothered by their ears.

Choose your seating arrangements wisely. If you know certain siblings are likely to spark off each other, it’s best to divide and conquer.

To buggy or not to buggy

Even if your little one doesn’t use a buggy at home, it’s worth considering bringing one on holiday anyway, especially if they’re not long out of it. Warm climates, longer walks and a disrupted routine can mean some smaller children get tired sooner than they might at home. Plus, it’s somewhere to sleep if they get tired during an evening meal or outing. Opt for a lighter buggy if you have one, as they are much easier to travel with.

Expectations

“Leave the kids behind” was the suggestion offered by a number of readers when I asked on social media for their tips for a successful family holiday, but if you’re taking them, lower your expectations. And then lower them some more.

Different routines, climate, food, sleeping arrangements and location can leave the children out of sorts. And best-laid plans can lead to big disappointments if parents aren’t realistic about how the reality is likely to play out. Don’t think tantrums, spillages and the usual family quibbles won’t happen just because you’re on holiday.

Don’t sweat the small stuff and just roll with it. Accept there’ll be days and times when things don’t go as you’d hoped. Fun times are often found in the simple things. Don’t plan activities for every single day – just give yourself time to relax and go with the flow (well, as much as you can with kids in tow).

Don’t be afraid to explore separately

If your children are of very different ages, or have very different interests, you may all have different ideas of what constitutes fun and relaxation. While everyone wants to take advantage of time together on holiday, don’t be afraid to separate to cover preferences on occasion.

And remember, just as head space is important at home, fitting in a little me-time for each parent is vital too.

Get in the pic

This one is probably more for the mammies. Don’t just take the photos, get in them. Your children won’t care in the future if your hair was messy, or you weren’t wearing make-up, or what you look like in a swimsuit.

And don’t be the person so busy taking the photos that you forget to be part of them. Your future self will thank you for remembering to capture the memories.

Happy holidays!