I was always teased at school about being English because that’s where my parents are from. I was Protestant, too, whereas most of my friends were Catholic and made to go to Mass every Sunday. My parents travelled a lot because of my dad’s job [curator of Islamic art at the Chester Beatty Library in Dublin] and we ate different foods, so I suppose there was something of the “other” about me. It wasn’t until I moved to New York in 1993 age 23 that I really felt Irish.
When you’re away from your own country, all of those differences fall away; Irish people in New York saw me as Irish. I hung out in the East Village with the other Irish at Sin-é cafe and I worked in an Irish pub called The Scratcher for a while. I learned the tin whistle and got really into trad music. I had never been exposed to this side of Irish culture growing up.
I moved back from New York after 9/11. It changed everything. People were coming from a place of fear and I didn’t want to raise my kids in that atmosphere. Plus I wanted to grow vegetables and be outside. But it was the Celtic Tiger era and Dublin was not the same place I’d grown up. I remember visiting a friend in Kerry, driving around in a 15-year-old Golf and noticing that all of the other cars on the roads were massive SUVs with Dublin registration plates. It used to be that the emigrants coming home from the US drove big cars and built big houses, but that had flipped.
I was really struck by how insidious the begrudgery was here. My then-husband [musician Mark Geary] was recording an album in Barbados and he’d managed to get a ticket for me to travel there with him as his stylist. I remember telling people and being so surprised by their reaction: “Oh my God, you’re so jammy!” It was said in jest but there was an undertone of begrudgery. In New York, the response would have been: “That’s amazing, fantastic, have an incredible time!” I think begrudgery is knitted into the fabric of our being and it comes from a place of lack, a fear that there isn’t enough to go around. In New York there’s an abundance.
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I also think taking care of each other is woven into our culture. I moved back to New York for a couple of years a decade ago, and when I told people there that I received children’s allowance in Ireland, they couldn’t believe it. There’s no access for wheelchairs on subways in New York and no news with signing for the deaf. I suppose because I was older and had young children I really noticed the “survival of the fittest” mentality. If you are not on top of your game in New York, somebody will literally kick you to the kerb and step over you.
I had no job when I came home in the early 2000s so I drove to shops around Ireland with a suitcase full of samples. I didn’t move into interiors then because there really wasn’t a market for it. People were spending money on fashion so I designed and made scarves, belts and some clothes. I met Tracy [Tucker] from Costume boutique – I had known her brother in New York – and she bought some of my pieces, which really opened doors for me.
Although I’d worked for Donna Karan in New York, I never felt like a fashion designer. I always felt like an impostor. A love of interiors was always in me though. My mother had incredible taste. Our childhood home was stunning and it was all done on a shoestring budget. She loved to browse antique shops and she would screech the car to a halt whenever she spotted a skip. I’d be absolutely mortified.
Although my parents were quite bohemian, Christmas was very traditional in our house
I love the pace of life in Ireland. Yes, we’re all busy, but it’s different here; it’s not the rat race of New York and other big cities. You can be in the garden, have a swim, go for a walk – it’s all on our doorstep. It’s a gentler, lovelier pace and we really need to hold on to that. Having said that, when I lived in Westmeath, I did feel isolated, working on my own and being away from people. There was a lot to love about living there, but being in Dublin close to my peers suits me. One thing I love about working with Dunnes Stores is that I have a team around me. That’s how I work best.
Although my parents were quite bohemian, Christmas was very traditional in our house and they always had people to stay and friends over for dinner. I absolutely love this time of year. I have always decorated the tree with the boys; I learned after a few years to just let them do it and then go back later and tidy it up! I adore cooking Christmas dinner with all the trimmings, but my favourite meal of the whole year is on Stephen’s Day. Everybody comes to me and I make sure there’s enough cold turkey and ham, then I bake a hash with potatoes, vegetables and stuffing in the oven for about four hours until it goes really golden brown and develops a gorgeous crust.
My eldest son, who is 25, has been in Australia for the past two years and he’ll be home on December 4th, so it’s going to be a big Christmas this year. I can’t wait.
In conversation with Marie Kelly. This interview, part of a series, was edited for clarity and length. Helen James’s Considered range is available in Dunnes Stores