Jeff Kinney's $500 million dollar literary series is still the pony to beat: last year, nine of the top 20 most borrowed library books in Ireland – take that, JK Rowling – were from the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series.
To date, the four film adaptations – Diary of a Wimpy Kid (2010), Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Rodrick Rules (2011), Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days (2012) – have not quite kept pace with their literary source.
Sure, the DOAWK movies have performed decently, if not spectacularly, at the box office, but they've never fully captured the anxious pre-teen charm and heart of Kinney's originals. And now, with a new cast in place, and tweaks to allow such mod-cons as social media, the wheels have come off entirely.
Even returning director David Bowers (Astro Boy, Flushed Away) can't stop this unlovely instalment from going south. The trouble begins when the Heffley family embark on a cross-country road-trip to visit their grandmother on her 90th birthday. Tyrannical mom (Silverstone) uses this opportunity to confiscate all phones and devices from her three sons and husband. For a four-day drive! Demands to sing along to Spice Girls' Wannabe soon follow. Put-upon titular hero Greg (Jason Drucker) complains. And he's right. This is a hostage situation and the first scene of most contemporary horror films.
In fact, Greg is always right. By incorporating so much You Tube and social media intro the film, Greg’s adorable insecurities are now genuine never-live-it-down events. When he is captured on camera with a diaper on his hand, he instantly becomes a global meme.
It's not just the internet: there's mean-spiritedness in The Long Haul – a veritable showcase of selfishness and breaking and entering – that simply wasn't there before. The film's depiction of country folk is the stuff of lazy SNL caricature. Even the poo gags lack the scatological precision of previous outings. Are we there yet?
