What was the first book to make an impression on you?
The Hobbit and The Little Grey Men.
What was your favourite book as a child?
The Lord of the Rings.
And what is your favourite book or books now?
It changes hourly.
Who is your favourite fictional character?
Ian Paisley or Martin McGuinness.
Who is the most under-rated Irish author?
Colin Bateman.
Which do you prefer – ebooks or the traditional print version?
Traditional.
What is the most beautiful book you own?
It Makes You Want to Spit, an Ulster punk coffee table book.
Where and how do you write?
In the kitchen, and by putting one fist in front of the other.
What book changed the way you think about fiction?
Catch-22.
What is the most research you have done for a book?
I spent a week in Niagara Falls for Maid of the Mist, which was six and a half days too long.
What book influenced you the most?
They all do.
What book would you give to a friend’s child on their 18th birthday?
I probably wouldn’t.
What book do you wish you had read when you were young?
Ulysses. Now I'm too old to read it.
What advice would you give to an aspiring author?
Write.
What weight do you give reviews?
I'll consider that if I'm ever reviewed in The Irish Times.
Where do you see the publishing industry going?
It will continue to be profitable.
What writing trends have struck you lately?
Old rope has currency.
What lessons have you learned about life from reading?
None. Idiots like me make shit up.
What has being a writer taught you?
Jealousy.
Which writers, living or dead, would you invite to your dream dinner party?
You say dinner party like it’s a good thing.
What is the funniest scene you’ve read?
Chapter One, Catch-22.
What is your favourite word?
Banoffee.
If you were to write a historical novel, which event or figure would be your subject?
I wouldn’t. The research!
What sentence or passage or book are you proudest of?
From Divorcing Jack:
“We had a bit of an argument about the lack of a condom. I volunteered to use my sock. She thought that idea was: (a) disgusting, (b) stupid. Socks weren’t water-tight, or whatever. She said, ‘You wear a sock, not only will I have a baby, but it’ll come out wearing a bloody jumper.’
We compromised on my withdrawal.
I didn’t. We British don’t withdraw from Ireland.”
It still goes down a storm in West Belfast.
What is the most moving book or passage you have read?
Love Story or Goodbye Mr Chips.
If you have a child, what book did you most enjoy reading to them?
‘Ulysses’ - it really messes with their heads.
Colin Bateman's The Dead Pass, the ninth in his Dan Starkey series
of crime novels, is published this month by Headline.
