An expert’s secret rules of drinking in an Irish bar

Everyone knows Irish bars are great, but make sure you volunteer early for your round

When you drink pints in Ireland, you’re going to end up in a round and it should be a simple concept, taking turns buying drinks, but drinkers beware. Irish rounds are a particular thing, a ritual intrinsically linked to our drinking and pub culture. There are rules, peculiarities and complexities akin to being in a secret society. Messing up can ruin reputations and even end friendships, mostly because generosity is something we want to portray, ingrained into us since the days of Brehon Law. A reputation for stinginess is a stigma no one wants to bear and being in a round is like playing Russian roulette with that reputation. So let’s go over the basics.

If you are in a pub with two or more people, consider yourself in a round – it’s a system, not just an act of generosity. The old rules of rounds dictated that we keep going till the other person stops, drops or it’s closing time. These days, we are generally more responsible. Stop when you want – but certain guidelines remain.

Don’t let the pints go fully empty before you order, especially when drinking stout. When there’s about one-third left in the glass, it’s time to act. If it’s not your round and you’re drinking faster than the person whose round it is, it’s polite to linger and slow down. You can subtly (or not!) let the round buyer know you’re ready by taking an exaggerated sip with an mmm or ahhh as you place your glass down, pretending you’re savouring it or signalling its deliciousness, but really you’re saying, “Hey, buddy, it’s your round”.

When it comes to what you’re drinking, be aware of the price. If you’re a top-shelf whiskey drinker or knocking back premium spirits and mixers, rounds are generally not the place for these – unless the person you’re with is drinking the same thing. Read the room. If your order is twice the price of what everyone else is drinking, you might not be called stingy but you will be accused of having notions, which is almost as bad. Consider lowering your standards or acknowledge that you’re being boujee and break out on your own. Or perhaps there is someone in the group who also has notions, they may offer themselves up to “go in with you”. It’s a win-win and no one goes home giving out about the drinks you ordered.

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‘Volunteer for your round early on. You’ll be in good favour if you buy your round while everyone still remembers’

What about when you’re out and genuinely only staying for one? Let this be known up top and just get your own drink, although someone may unwittingly include you before you get to do this. Then you are expected to let them know, more than once, that you will get them back next time. Anyone not boozing but still ordering a drink should usually be included, but may not be expected to get a round in if they are only on water or a soft drink. However, if they are drinking something non-alcoholic that has a similar monetary value to the pint, then they are in the round. You do not comment if someone is not boozing. There was a time in Ireland when not drinking was a reason for slagging someone but these days most people have the cop-on to just shut up and do their own thing – as they should.

Don’t expect it to be even-stevens in every session. There is usually someone more eager/thirsty/cash-rich who will buy more out of turn, and there may also be someone who’s avoiding their round. Depending on how well you know the gang you are with, you can speak up but usually you just nod and keep drinking.

Volunteer for your round early on. You’ll be in good favour if you buy your round while everyone still remembers. Buying crisps when it’s your round is never a bad idea. If you are the host or the arranger of the meet-up, you should buy the first round. If it’s your birthday, wedding, etc, you may be told not to buy a round (but you probably should). The person who makes the biggest deal of getting the round is the person watching to see if everyone buys their round. Someone should be vaguely keeping track but you don’t want to look like the person who’s keeping track. It’s a complex game.

If all else fails, put your faith in drink karma, a concept that Judith Boyle, beer sommelier and publican, shared with me when we spoke about our fear of rounds. Her philosophy is to always get a round in early and not worry too much about getting your drink back that session because drink karma! “You meet people and you buy them a drink. They’re like, ‘Oh, I’ll get you back,’ but I say, ‘No, it’s drink karma.’ Your drink will always come back to you in Ireland.”

Extracted from A Compendium of Irish Pints: The Culture, Customs and Craic by Ali Dunworth, which will be published on May 7th by Nine Bean Rows