As a strong leader, you can wield influence while still being empathic. How? It begins with how you enter a room.
Here are three things to keep in mind when you’re addressing a group and need to connect:
1. When you enter the room, be aware of your unconscious cues. When you stand, are you taking up all of your space, or do you shrink into corners?
When you move, do you move confidently, or do you slink?
When you’re sitting alone, do you slouch or sit straight?
There are two essential points here. The first is that you’re always signaling about your intentions and feelings, and so is everyone else.
The second point is that most of the time you don’t pay conscious attention to all those signals – either the ones you’re putting out or the ones others are sending to you. Your unconscious mind handles all that.
It’s essential to get a handle on these cues.
2. Focus on a key emotion. Think about the charisma of an actor like Kevin Spacey. How does he achieve it? Most people think of charisma as something you're born with, but in fact we all have our charismatic moments.
Think of a time when you’ve walked into a meeting, or come home to your significant other, and been asked without preamble, “What happened?”
You’ve been brimming over with some news — either good or bad. You’re excited, or in despair, or triumphant, or whatever the case is. That’s charisma.
It’s really about focus. You need to focus your emotions before any meeting, conversation, or presentation.
3. Have something interesting to say. If you're going to wield influence, you need to know what you want to be influential about. And you'd better have done your homework because once all eyes are upon you, everyone will expect you to have something worthwhile for them.
In association with Harvard Business Review