Who should I appoint as an executor in my will?

May I have your advice in regard to appointing an executor to my will. I was thinking of asking my solicitor and one of my nephews to make sure my wishes are carried out.

I have no children and only two brothers who are just younger than I and two nephews who will be the beneficiaries.

My solicitor has agreed when I was altering my will a couple of years ago and I am now in the position to make some update and make some alterations.

Mr M.W.

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It sounds easy, doesn’t it, appointing an executor in your will. It’s just a name of someone to oversee the process. Except it is not.

First of all, the process is legal and that requires precision and organisation. If your estate is complex then that is even more so the case. Get things wrong and the wrong people can get the wrong inheritance or the whole estate can get tied up in legal red tape for years.

Not everyone is cut out to be an executor. Many people think the whole process is too stressful for them or they are concerned that they will find themselves out of their depth.

Then there is the age factor. We all have close friends or family who we would trust in the role, but if they are close to us in age then it may well be that by the time we die they will be too frail themselves to undertake the role.

All of that is why you should take two important steps before redrawing your will.

First, think carefully about who among your family and friends you trust to act responsibly, yet empathetically, in the role.

Wills by their nature become an issue at times when families are grieving and emotions can be raw. Being organised is all well and good, but if an executor is seen as brusque or unapproachable then it can create more problems than you, your beneficiaries or the executor themselves would wish.

Second, when you settle on a name, make a point of checking with them that they are happy to act in the role. You’d be surprised how many people are not comfortable doing so.

Anyone can renounce the role – i.e, step away from it. When a person dies, the executor to their will has to accept or renounce the role. They can also reserve their position which means stepping away for the time being with the possibility to becoming active again further down the process.

An executor looking to avoid engaging in the role must do so before your formal appointment and before probate. They need to sign a written renunciation witnessed by people who are neither family nor mentioned in the will.

That is why many people choose to name more than one executor and, more often than not, ensure that one of them is their solicitor. Given the legal element to the work of getting an estate through probate and distributed to beneficiaries, there is a lot of sense in having someone on board who is familiar with the legal processes involved.

Having said that, for most ordinary estates, a lay executor should be well able to manage even if they need to consult a solicitor at some point in the process. It really is a matter of what you are comfortable with.

In your case, you have no immediate family and your brothers, as you note, are not much younger than yourself, which makes their appointment impractical at this stage.

You could certainly ask one of your nephews, but the important thing is not to appoint someone simply because they are family. If you think one or other of the nephews would be a good fit for the role then that is fine. If you are not sure then maybe think again.

The fact that they will be beneficiaries in the will does not in any way disbar them from acting as executors. Most people appoint close family and/or solicitors, so it is more or less inevitable that most executors will also be beneficiaries of a will.

And bear in mind that while it is good to have two executors – if, for nothing else, to ensure a backup if one takes ill, emigrates or whatever – it is not obligatory. Your solicitor can certainly carry out the role themselves. In that event, however, you want to make sure that the will is worded so that a backup from the law firm is available if anything happens to your solicitor before you die.

As your solicitor has clearly advised, if you are amending the will anyway – and paying to do so – then that is clearly the time to update your executors.

One final point: some people stress themselves out hugely about replacing executors in their wills – either because the original executors have become frail, or are likely to do so, or because subsequent events have given pause for thought on their suitability for the role. Don’t worry.

I have yet to come across anyone who was miffed about not having to act as executor. For most people, it was agreed as a favour for a family member or friend. Having the potential burden lifted is a relief.

Please send your queries to Dominic Coyle, Q&A, The Irish Times, 24-28 Tara Street, Dublin 2, or by email to dominic.coyle@irishtimes.com with a contact phone number. This column is a reader service and is not intended to replace professional advice