‘When I say it’s oaber, Rosser, Ine thalken about me and Hodor’s business. It’s boddixed’

Ross O’Carroll-Kelly: Ronan’s there, ‘I sted at the roulette table too long – stordee of me life’

‘I’m not posting bail for Conor McGregor. That focker can use his own money’

Ross O’Carroll Kelly: Ronan wants to go to New York and hab a woord with his heerdo

‘Why is the centre of the Irish world on St Patrick’s Day such a kip?’

Sound Off: Dublin Theatre Festival artistic director Willie White on O’Connell Street

Ronan shot me a look like he’d just watched me pull a five-metre length of intestine out of the bottom of my chinos