Jose Mourinho responds predictably to predictable accusations

Jose Mourinho and former Italian international Antonio Cassano have been having a most excellent feud for quite a while now, one that kicked off again in February when Cassano, a pundit these days, said watching Mourinho’s Roma “makes me want to vomit”.

And last week he had another go when he suggested that Mourinho “doesn’t give a shit about football”. “He doesn’t like to work, he doesn’t know how to communicate or speak... he’s just cinema.”

Did Mourinho respond? Oh yes.

“Cassano played for Roma, for Inter and for Real Madrid. In Madrid he is only remembered for his jacket. With Roma he won a Supercoppa without playing. At Inter he didn’t even manage the Lombardy Cup in a friendly. You know what I won with Inter, Real Madrid and Roma?”

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In fairness to Cassano, though, he always reckoned winning was, well, overrated. From his autobiography: “The problem is that we live in a culture obsessed with success. We fool ourselves into thinking we have to do our best and make sacrifices to succeed. But why? Trophies come and go. Once you’ve retired, it will all be gone, they’ll just be numbers in an almanac, nobody will remember you or what you’ve won.”

But did he give his all to his clubs? “At best, I gave 50 per cent. Maybe a tiny bit more in the good years. But so what? Thanks to my talent, I live like a king... I have a great time.”

It’s hard not to love the lad.

Spot the difference: Chelsea and Tory governments

It was a simple enough observation by Tory MP Greg Hands on the tweet machine: “I have been MP for @ChelseaFC [sic] for 18 years and in that time there have been 18 managers.”

The responses? You can imagine – e.g. Chas Milne: “So Chelsea FC have had the same amount of managers this season that the Tories had PMs last year.”

Sam Wilson: “I’ve been running businesses since the Brexit referendum, and in that time there have been seven Conservative Chancellors and five Conservative Prime Ministers. British businesses, desperate for certainty and continuity, have been about as successful as Chelsea during that time.”

Sam Hardy: “You know how we feel with 5 PMs in the last 6 years then. No forward momentum. Stagnation. Dropping down the leagues. Reduced fan base. Lower income. Less exciting. Fewer European trips. Irony overload.”

In fairness, it was an open goal.

Quote

“I thought at one point he might have snapped his eyelash, which would have been tragic. But he seems to be responding okay.” – Everton gaffer Sean Dyche on Harry Kane’s somewhat dramatic reaction to a brush with Abdoulaye Doucouré's hand.

Number: 678

That’s how many minutes Courtney Brosnan had gone without conceding a goal for Ireland, until Emily Fox’s opener for the United States on Saturday. Some run.

Word of Mouth

“If you’re worried, don’t come.” – Frank Lampard’s message to any Chelsea players who might be concerned about playing Real Madrid in the Champions League this week. You’d worry now that not enough will turn up to allow Frank field a team.

“You cannot train the players in the zoo and then go to the jungle on Sunday. It’s impossible.” – Mikel Arteta explaining why he had his Arsenal players train with ‘You’ll Never Walk Alone’ blasting through speakers before their trip to Anfield last season. Did it work? They were eaten alive, losing 4-0. So, no.

“We win games. If we don’t win games, I would be sacked. It’s not because my hair is better than the other ones.” – Pep Guardiola explaining, rather uniquely, why he has never been sacked during his managerial career.

“The Super League has become a Little Red Riding Hood character, a wolf disguised as a grandmother. Who are they fooling? Nobody. They are cartels over meritocracy and democracy. It’s money over trophies.” – Uefa president Alexander Ceferin directs some fresh ire at Super League plotters Barcelona, Real Madrid and Juventus. “What a big mouth you have,” they’ll no doubt reply.

“I just reviewed the campaign. I do not agree with the video. That is why I fight for individual image rights. PSG is a great club and a great family, but of course it is not Kylian Saint Germain.” – The Mbappé lad taking issue with his club using him in an ad for season tickets.

“I don’t understand Mbappé's message. Somebody stop his ego. He wants to take care of everything. Marketing, communication, choose the sports director, choose the players he wants to play with. He is clumsy. He is not elegant.” – PSG old boy Christophe Dugarry taking issue with Mbappe for taking issue with his club.