Wales v South Africa Millennium Stadium, 2.45By choosing six players with the same surname Wales have prompted much glee beyond Offa's Dyke before today's encounter with South Africa. Mike Ruddock's pre-match team-talk would make a perfect Monty Python sketch, but it is the advice of Corporal Jones rather than Dafydd, Adam or Steve which will resonate loudest around the dressing-room.
While a sense of impending doom may seem premature given the Boks have yet to kick a ball on their grand slam tour of Britain and Ireland, the Welsh simply cannot afford to panic even against such formidable opposition.
The last time the countries met, in Pretoria just four months ago, Ruddock's men conceded seven tries in a 53-18 beating, and South Africa's confidence has since spiralled even higher.
Under Jake White the resurgent Boks are already Tri-Nations champions and are showing every appearance of a side gathering momentum.
With arguably the world's best lineout in Victor Matfield and Bakkies Botha, a back row incorporating the massive talents of Schalk Burger and Joe van Niekerk, and a couple of midfield hard nuts in Marius Joubert and De Wet Barry it is not hard to understand why they are prospering under White's enlightened regime.
In contrast, the Welsh regions have performed modestly in this year's Heineken European Cup and, in the Gwent Dragons' full back Percy Montgomery, the visitors even have a spy with the inside track on Ruddock's coaching methods. When the former South African lock Kobus Wiese suggested this week that "I can't see how they can beat the Springboks" he was not reflecting a minority view.
Even the Welsh assistant coach Scott Johnson accepts his side do not have the forward artillery to beat South Africa at their own hard-nosed game, all of which places a serious onus on the Welsh backs to perform the twinkle-toed heroics which are fast becoming their trademark.
If they toss too much loose ball around too soon, the likes of Burger will gorge themselves all day long. Wales will only prosper if they do their basics well enough to secure at least 50 per cent possession.
Even that figure may be fanciful; this is a big step up for the debutant hooker Steve Jones, and the new number eight Ryan Jones is the rawest of recruits, even against a Springbok back row with an average age of 23.
In 17 games against South Africa, Wales have only one win and one draw. White is not planning on the hosts improving on that record.
"If you knew where we have come from and how hard we have worked it would definitely be considered a disaster if we did not get the win against Wales," he insisted yesterday .
Some will recall the similarly blunt tones of another Jones - the Australian coach Alan - who was the last man to steer a Southern Hemisphere side to a clean sweep in Britain and Ireland back in 1984. He coined the immortal phrase, "one day you're a rooster, the next you're a feather duster," to warn the Wallabies against complacency, but White's modern grand slam pretenders are fuelled by an almost religious conviction.
"We have something special with our new coach," said Montgomery, attempting to explain the Springboks' voyage back from the edge of reason over the past year or so.
"It is what South African rugby has been missing: that they can trust the coach and the decisions he makes. The players are happy and, now that we've set our standards, we have to maintain them." Few would bet against them storming Jonestown.
WALES: G Thomas (Toulouse, capt); H Luscombe (Dragons) S Parker (Ospreys) G Henson (Ospreys) S Williams (Ospreys); Stephen Jones (Clermont-A) D Peel (Llanelli); Duncan Jones (Ospreys) Steve Jones (Dragons) A Jones (Ospreys) B Cockbain (Ospreys) M Owen (Dragons) Dayfdd Jones (Llanelli) C Charvis (Newcastle) Ryan Jones (Ospreys). Replacements: M Davies (Ospreys), G Jenkins (Cardiff), L Charteris (Dragons), M Williams (Cardiff), M Phillips (Llanelli), C Sweeney (Dragons), T Shanklin (Cardiff).
SOUTH AFRICA: P Montgomery (Dragons); B Paulse (W Province) M Joubert (W Province) D W Barry (W Province) A Willemse (Lions); J van der Westhuizen (NEC) F du Preez (Blue Bulls); O du Randt (Cheetahs) J Smit (Natal Sharks, capt) E Andrews (W Province) B Botha (Blue Bulls) V Matfield (Blue Bulls) S Burger (W Province) J Smith (Cheetahs) J van Niekerk (W Province). Replacements: H Shimange, C J van der Linde, G Britz (all Cheetahs), T Dluhane (Pumas), M Claasens (Cheetahs), J de Villiers (Western Province), B Russell (Sharks).
Guardian Service
