Happiness is... canvassing in a hairdressing salon, Tánaiste says on Dáil’s combative last day

Retiring TDs clear out their offices as Micheál Martin and Bríd Smith get into head-to-head over alternative government and both their fathers being ‘busmen’

Outgoing Minister for Enterprise, Trade and Employment Simon Coveney (left), who is not seeking re-election as a TD in the forthcoming general election, at Leinster House on Thursday. Photograph: Dara Mac Dónaill
Outgoing Minister for Enterprise, Trade and Employment Simon Coveney (left), who is not seeking re-election as a TD in the forthcoming general election, at Leinster House on Thursday. Photograph: Dara Mac Dónaill

Was it a happy last day of the 33rd Dáil? Well, for Tánaiste Micheál Martin, “one of the happiest places to campaign in is the hairdressing salon”, he told the chamber.

He was responding to the question from Ceann Comhairle Seán Ó Fearghaíl: “How familiar is the Tánaiste with the hair and beauty sector?”

The Tánaiste had been canvassing with party colleague Stephen Donnelly in Wicklow recently.

“We walked into a barber shop and Deputy Donnelly said he always gets very lonely when he comes into this place. It’s an issue for those of us who are challenged,” he said, as Mr Donnelly rubbed his follicly challenged head.

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The issue of hairdressers came up when Sinn Féin’s Louise O’Reilly raised a €1.4 billion grant scheme for small businesses where €1.1 billion had been returned to the exchequer because the scheme was “too complicated” and seemed to exclude hairdressers who “are struggling every bit as much” as other sectors.

Mr Martin assured Ms O’Reilly that he would talk to Ministers urgently about this.

It was a lighter moment on the final day that turned into a mix of tributes to and from retiring TDs, fiery electioneering, heckling, interventions and threats from the Ceann Comhairle that he would suspend the House if people did not behave.

The election campaign was clearly in the air including when retiring People Before Profit TD Bríd Smith said Opposition parties had a “duty to stop propping up Fianna Fáil and Fine Gael” and to “make a commitment” if re-elected that “they will not prop up either of these 100-year-old parties of failure”.

Micheál Martin responded with: “I am the son of a busman.”

Ms Smith intervened: “So am I. I am the daughter of a busman.”

Tánaiste: “I came from a working-class community.” Ms Smith: “So what?”

Tánaiste: “I’ll tell you so what. I’m the son of a busman who was a founding member of the NBRU.”

Ms Smith: “So was my Da.”

Tánaiste: “I’m the first to get to second-level education in our family and we were the first generation to get to third level.”

Ms Smith: “I was the first to do the Leaving Certificate in my family.”

Tánaiste: “I don’t need lectures from the far left, and many from the far left who were educated in far more luxurious schools than I was ever educated in.”

Ms Smith: “You can talk all you like about your childhood but you haven’t addressed the inequality.”

The Ceann Comhairle appealed again for order as the Tánaiste said he had the good grace not to interrupt Ms Smith but she had not done likewise.

He said “I am a product of the Fianna Fáil-Donogh O’Malley revolution of free education”.

“God help us,” she interrupted again. But the Tánaiste said “it was not ‘God help us’ because it brought on a lot of us” as he spoke of his passion for education and why he became a minister for education to ensure every child had the opportunity of education.

“There are 110,000 children with special needs that are not being met,” said Ms Smith. The Ceann Comhairle called on her to stop interrupting as the Tánaiste rounded on her and said she did “not have a monopoly on care or compassion on your side of the House”.

“You declare you’re a socialist” but “you have never embraced the Irish economic model that has created enterprise and the opportunity for people to grow and develop in this country. That is the fundamental difference between us, and we should debate that in this House.”

Through the morning some retiring TDs were clearing out their offices. They have a week from the date the election is called to vacate while sitting Oireachtas members seeking re-election can hold on until after the election count should they lose their seats.

In the Dáil by early afternoon most TDs had left Leinster House and the Ceann Comhairle, speaking in Irish, wished all retiring TDs and those seeking re-election the very best, as he pulled the shutters down on the 33rd Dáil at 15.44.