Demand for Amen support to male domestic abuse victims up

Demand for the services of the main support organisation for male victims of domestic violence increased by over a third last year.

The 2014 annual report from Amen, published yesterday, reports increased demand for counselling, its helpline, court accompaniment service and one-to-one support sessions last year.

“In 2014 slightly over six and a half thousand (6,660) contacts were received by Amen...These contacts represent a 36.8 per cent increase in overall activity within the service from the previous year,” says the report.

One-to-one support sessions

The NGO provided 477 one-to-one support sessions to 359 men in 2014 - an increase of 47 per cent on 2013 and 82 per cent compared with 2012. Most (70 per cent) were to Irish men and 30 per cent to non-nationals.

Demand for its counselling service increased by over 100 per cent, with five volunteer counsellors providing 214 counselling hours through 2014, at the Amen offices in Navan, Co Meath, and in Dublin.

Its helpline had its busiest month in February, with the first quarter the busiest of 2014.

“We received 5,670 calls to the helpline in 2014. This is an overall increase of 39 per cent from 2013. Out of these 5,670 calls almost 47 per cent (2,642) were classified as ‘crisis calls’. Crisis calls are from men and occasionally relatives who are extremely distressed by their circumstances.”

Psychological abuse

Men disclosed being verbally and psychologically abused (61 per cent of disclosures) as well as seriously physically assaulted (39 per cent). Almost 95 per cent of contacts were from men who had children.

The report included quotes from letters to the NGO from male victims of domestic abuse, as well as from family or friends of such victims.

Among the comments of men who used the service were:

- “She has punched, kicked, torn my hair, tried to break my fingers, spat at me and bit me on the face, hands, arms and legs. I am not a big man but I am a black belt in karate. I have never hit her.”

- “I don’t have any friends as she doesn’t like me to, nor do I have any hobbies as she doesn’t like me going anywhere without her.”

‘

Very violent’

- “She became very violent and aggressive. I couldn’t disagree with her. I was not allowed to have an opinion of my own. She was always right.”

- “I still love her. I can forgive her. All I want is to get my old wife back. But if I can’t have that, what about our children? If I leave I know things will only get worse.”

Nicola Dowling, Amen director, said many male victims of domestic abuse were forced to leave the family home. The reduced access to their children "compounds the emotional abuse to which they may already be exposed".

She hoped the Domestic Violence Bill, which is being drawn up, would improve protections for male victims, “making it much easier for victims to obtain interim barring orders”.