Miriam Lord: McDowell uses sharp wit to cutting effect

Micheál Martin managed to upset everyone and Enda Kenny was removed from office

The Leas-Chathaoirleach of the Seanad was rendered red-faced and speechless on Tuesday when Michael McDowell blew the whistle on his brazen attempt to curry favour with his voters at the expense of political rivals.

Sometimes, it seems, a cute Kerryman can be too cute for his own good.

Paul Coghlan, in the chair, just about managed an embarrassed grin as the former tánaiste expertly reeled him in over a letter he sent to county councillors warning of impending calamity if the McDowell-sponsored bill on Seanad reform went through.

“You will notice that this Bill plans to substantially reduce the role local authority members play in electing members of Seanad Éireann,” wrote Coghlan, frightening the life out of those councillors who enjoy being buttered up by Senators anxious for their vote.

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As it stands, council members form the main body of a very privileged cohort – it also includes incoming TDs and outgoing senators – which picks most of the senators.

“In essence, 158 TDs, 60 senators and 949 councillors will only elect 13 senators on one panel, as opposed to the current election of 43 senators on five panels. This is a significantly huge reduction,” Coghlan said.

The proposed widening of the franchise will “naturally dilute the role that the local authority members play in deciding the membership of Seanad Éireann”.

Were the unthinkable to happen, there wouldn’t be half as many hopefuls beating a path to councillors’ doors bearing bottles of whiskey and All-Ireland tickets in the hope of a favourable scratch come election time.

In alerting them to this appalling vista, Coghlan thoughtfully included an extract from his recent second stage speech on the Bill, when he took a principled stand in their defence.

Paul – in common with many of his colleagues – will not hear a bad word against councillors. Earlier this year, enough of them voted to re-elect him, albeit on transfers after a cliff-hanger count.

So the Fine Gael veteran, who was moved to tears when he became Leas-Chathaoirleach, knows how important it is to keep them happy.

McDowell confessed he was perplexed by this letter, but would not embarrass the author by naming him.

He was puzzled as he was under the impression that Fine Gael supported the Bill, particularly as the programme for government included a commitment to implement the recommendations of the Manning committee on reform. Not only that, but the Taoiseach recently visited the House to voice his support.

Now, in the light of the Fine Gael Senator’s letter, McDowell was worried about the Government changing its mind.

To make matters worse, he was “a bit disturbed” to discover the letter named just five Senators as the Bill’s principal supporters, even though many more had co-signed it.

David Norris loudly demanded to know who would write such a thing.

“Name and shame!” he bellowed.

Senators demanded clarification.

The deputy chair felt obliged to speak.

“I am duty bound to remain silent,” said Coghlan, sheepishly.

McDowell was further intrigued. “With the exception of myself, all of the other people mentioned as being the movers of this Bill are people who are elected by county councillors” . . . and it is interesting to note that the letter naming them was sent to every county councillor in the country.

“This raises the question, of course, a Leas-Chathaoirleach,” he innocently inquired, “why it would be that anybody would so misrepresent the proposers of the Bill as to somehow excite opposition against them among their electorate.”

The Leas-Chathaoirleach said nothing and moved the proceedings on.

But when Frank Feighan raised newspaper reports about opposition to the plan to relocate Seanad Éireann to the National Museum (Frank wants them to move to Ballaghadereen), Coghlan interjected.

“You can’t believe everything you read.”

“You should write that on your letters,” McDowell shot back.

Falling over fallen Fianna Fáilers

The upstairs bar in Doheny & Nesbitt's was packed for Wednesday night's launch of Hell at the Gates, the much-anticipated "inside story" of Ireland's financial downfall and Fianna Fáil's fall from grace.

This was the second week in a row for a big Fianna Fáil-themed launch. Supporters and insiders who have hardly been seen since the party imploded in 2011 were out in force last week for the launch of a former senior adviser’s biography of Douglas Hyde.

They were out in numbers again this week for John Lee and Danny McConnell’s account of what happened behind the scenes in Brian Cowen’s government when the economy went into meltdown.

Willie O’Dea, one of the few frontbench survivors from that torrid period in Fianna Fáil’s history, relived some unpleasant memories from the 2011 general election trail, recalling how he was subjected to “dog’s abuse” on the canvass.

“Jaysus, you’ve an awful lot of enemies around here,” marvelled a member of his team.

“They’re not enemies,” Willie told him. “The ones turning their backs on me are friends.”

The book draws on the recollections of those politicians who were in the eye of a political storm and at the heart of what the authors describe as “the most hated government in living memory”.

Cowen, who was among those interviewed, didn't make it to the launch, but former minister Mary Coughlan and party leader Micheál Martin were there, along with most of his parliamentary party. We also spotted Des Richardson, Bertie Ahern's long-time pal, in the crowd.

Government Ministers Paschal Donohoe, Simon Harris and Leo Varadkar put in appearances, as did Finian McGrath and Mattie McGrath, while former Labour leader Joan Burton was one of the first in the long queue to buy the book, which is already top of the bestseller list.

The crowd was swelled by the arrival of a very large contingent of journalists who were attending a farewell party for three departing Leinster House stalwarts in the adjoining bar area.

Sarah McInerney, former political correspondent of the Sunday Times, has departed to co-host Newstalk's evening Drive programme; Myles McEntee, latterly of the Sun, is retiring after many distinguished years of service; and RTÉ's Deirdre McCarthy, who co-ordinated politics coverage, is returning to the mothership to take up the top job in radio current affairs.

Martin loses Dáil popularity contest

So the Dáil sits for two days next week, with the party leaders missing for one of them and a hasty put-together agenda to fill the time.

Opting to rise for the Halloween break was not the most sensible thing to do, but it was agreed over a month ago by the members of the new Business Committee which was set up in a blaze of self-congratulation by TDs anxious to prove their commitment to Dáil reform.

The committee’s authority, which aims to give deputies from all parties and groupings an equal say in how business is conducted, was gravely undermined on Tuesday when the Dáil voted to rescind its Halloween decision.

After the Fianna Fáil leader threw a strop and demanded that the House should sit, the other main parties had little choice but to go along with him.

He surprised people on all sides of the house, not least his own troops, a number of whom had already made family arrangements for the week.

Micheál Martin was not the most popular man in Leinster House after his call for a vote to overturn the committee’s decision saw the plans of many staffers and journalists bite the dust. People were scratching their heads, wondering why he did it.

Some said he acted in a fit of pique after Chief Whip Regina Doherty tore into him on radio for playing games and criticising Fine Gael at every turn.

"Micheál needs to sit back now and stop with his spin and start coming up with real policies so that he can show people how Fianna Fáil would govern any differently to when they wrecked the country," she told Morning Ireland.

In calling for a vote on the adjournment after Doherty had just proposed it in the Dáil, perhaps he expected Doherty to stick to her guns and back the Business Committee’s decision.

She would then suffer embarrassment in the event of the Dáil refusing to back her.

But the Chief Whip was delighted with him, because she never wanted the recess in the first place.

The whispers in Fianna Fáil were all pointing in the direction of Martin's confident, Clare TD Timmy Dooley. It was all his fault, it seems.

How could that be? Did Timmy just persuade his boss to annoy everyone by springing this surprise or was there another, more pressing reason?

Perhaps Sinn Féin might have had something to do with it. Perhaps Sinn Féin was planning to kick up when the adjournment was proposed and perhaps Timmy got wind of it. And maybe he convinced Micheál to get in ahead of them.

Not that Fianna Fáil will ever admit to being pushed into making any sort of decision of foot of something the Shinners might be planning to do.

But it’s as good an explanation as any for their leader’s sudden rush of blood to the head.

Enda removed from office

The Government was turfed out of office this week not once, but twice.

Enda Kenny

, along with a number of his Ministers, was escorted from Government Buildings to Leinster House and told he couldn’t come back.

But it was a temporary blip. The fire alarm had gone off and the place was evacuated.

Dangerous use of a toaster, apparently.

Two days in a row.

However, Finian McGrath was blue in the face denying to his colleagues that he was having sneaky cigarettes in the gents.

Meanwhile, congratulations to the Irish Farmers' Journal and its Irish Country Living magazine team for nabbing a high-profile keynote speaker for their annual Women and Agriculture conference which took place in Sligo on Thursday.

The Taoiseach’s wife Fionnuala O’Kelly (from that well-known farming heartland of Clontarf) told her audience: “You’ve no idea how dull and ordinary I am.”

She then announced that she was to star in a new reality TV show called Living with Enda. (We made up that last bit.)

More than 600 women attended the conference, which is now in its ninth year.

Fionnuala (she thinks the Obamas make a great couple) said she “doesn’t have time to read negative things about Enda” and lamented the invasive nature of social media.

Before she married and was going out with himself, she said journalists knew about their romance but never printed anything about it.

And while her husband was very young when he became a TD, she said she wanted her own children to be in their 40s before they decided if they wanted to go in to politics.

According to Irish Country Living, the Taoiseach's wife cautioned that democracy needed to be minded and nurtured because bad politicians can bring ruin very quickly.