"ROYAL divorce shock", screamed yesterday's newspaper billboards. But surely not? if nothing else, this last week has proved that the antics of Britain's number one dysfunctional family no longer shock the world.
Only last Thursday, Queen Elizabeth's cousin Marina, who is 28th in line to the throne, threw her "commoner" husband, Paul Mowatt, out of the family home, applied for a restraining order to prevent him coming near her and announced their separation.
Marina embarrassed her family "by becoming pregnant while unmarried and later revealing that her "snarling" mother, Princess Alexandra, a close confidante of Prince Philip, had tried to persuade her to have an abortion. She even vividly described her mother's gesture - holding a thumb and forefinger two inches apart - to emphasise how small the foetus would be.
However, Marina has now returned to the royal fold, her behaviour long forgiven and her husband forgotten. If only the same could be said for that other "commoner". Lord Charteris, Queen Elizabeth's former private secretary, famously described the Duchess of York: "A vulgarian ... vulgar, vulgar, vulgar."
"Free loading and free living Fergie" may well have been "kicked out" of the royal family yesterday but palace officials fear her antics will continue to dominate the headlines, particularly as the Duchess of York described her divorce as "only a piece of paper". She promised, or perhaps threatened, that she will remain the "best of friends" with her husband.
The Sun's recent editorial probably best summed up the palace's feelings about the "Fergie timebomb". "If only the queen could order `Off with her head'."
Sarah Ferguson will be remembered as the royal wife who cheated on her loyal husband, misled him, publicly embarrassed him, privately humiliated him and famously turned him into a bigger cuckold than Brig Andrew Parker Bowles. "From toe sticking to AIDS tests, skint Fergie made Royal Family squirm", screamed yesterday's Sun's headline.
Who can forget those infamous photographs, published world wide, of a topless Fergie caressing her financial adviser, Mr, John Bryant, as he sucked her toes, while her children - Queen Elizabeth's grandchildren - played nearby? Surprisingly, the Duke of York apparently can. According to close friends, he still refuses to believe his wife was ever unfaithful to him, insisting that Mr Bryant was simply advising Fergie over her well documented financial problems.
"Andrew closes his ears and his eyes to reports and rumours, he doesn't like to be told anything bad about her. He rationalises this by comparing himself with his brother Charles. He said the other week, `You must understand that the way I treat my wife and the way my brother treats his are very different,'" said one friend.
The difference being, of course, that Charles had a mistress throughout his marriage to the Princess of Wales, while Andrew still loves his wife, despite Fergie's numerous betrayals.
As Fergie jetted off to be with her new man, Austrian tennis star, Thomas Muster, earlier this month, Buckingham Palace was forced to make an unprecedented denial of rumours about the Duke of York's willingness to accommodate his wife's behaviour and his own celibacy.
"Our stand on the rumour has been constant. Any suggestion that the Duke of York has AIDS is utter rubbish He is in command of servicemen and there is no way he would be allowed to continue his duties if there was any question mark over his health and fitness. The suggestion that he is seriously ill has been circulating for some time but it is complete band utter nonsense", the palace official said.
So what does the future now hold for Fergie? Well, a humiliating court appearance appears to be on the cards, with her former friend, Lily Mahtani, suing her over a £100,000 loan.
The temptation of paying off her alleged £3 million debts with a kiss and tell" book will persist, unless Queen Elizabeth continues to "bail Fergie out". But for how long the royal family can afford to buy her silence remains to be seen.
Royal historian Dr David Starkey predicts she will be forced to leave Britain. "Like Diana, Sarah will eventually flee to America. If Diana ends up as a two bit celebrity living in Malibu, Fergie will wind up as a three bit star in Las Vegas.
But perhaps palace officials and the royal family have all learned something from these "troubled" times. To the annoyance of both Diana and Fergie, Queen Elizabeth herself is attempting to help Prince Edward's steady girlfriend, Sophie Rhys Jones, integrate into the family.
"Why is she getting such an easy ride? We were thrown to the wolves. She is being held up as perfect while we are now classed as troublemakers," Diana has complained to friends.
Surprisingly, Sophie, who is "another commoner", is allowed to live with Edward in a separate apartment at Buckingham Palace, has her own room at Windsor Castle and has accompanied him on many royal outings.
Diana and Fergie were only allowed to enjoy such "privileges" after their engagements.
However, as Sophie joins the celebrations for Queen Elizabeth's 70th birthday this weekend, she must wonder exactly what life with the royals will entail.
Ten years" ago Fergie was hailed as a necessary breath of fresh air for the royal household. But for years now, the royal family, the public and the media have been holding their breath, shocked at the antics of "the most shameful royal wife ever.