Offering a helping hand

Bringing up children can leave mothers struggling and isolated. That's where local helpers comes in, writes Sylvia Thompson

After the birth of her twins last year, Angela Byrne found it tough to be at home with three children under three. With no family or friends close by and a husband who worked shifts, the 39-year-old was often alone with her young family. Relief came when a public-health nurse referred her to Home-Start, a voluntary support scheme for families under stress.

"Initially I thought I don't want some nosy person in my house, I've enough on my plate with three children. But I felt really low, very cut off and lonely. My husband works shifts, I had never met my neighbours and I didn't drive at that time, so I thought I'd give it a go." She says it has been the lifeline she needed. "I worked for 20 years, and it's a huge culture shock to have been so long mixing with adults and then to be closed in a house with young children."

Home-Start is one of two complementary iniatives set up to support families with young children and babies. In it and the Community Mothers scheme, trained volunteers from the community visit mums regularly over months and sometimes years.

"Isolation is one of the biggest problems facing new mothers. They often have nobody to talk to and share their thoughts with on how the baby is - or even to discuss something they just heard on the radio. We offer support and friendship. We are not there to judge whether the kitchen hasn't been cleaned for a week but to support the mum so that she can cope with her baby," says Mary Canavan, a long-time volunteer with Home-Start in Blanchardstown, in north-west Dublin.

Angela Byrne says: "My volunteer from Home-Start calls once or twice a week, and we sit and chat or she brings the twins for a walk or lets me go and have a bath. It's terrfic that mothers who have reared their families can be so generous as to volunteer to help young mothers like me."

Home-Start is a primary prevention programme. It offers support in the belief that in the long term it will reduce depression, crime, family breakdown and other problems caused by a stressful home life.

"There are many mothers we've kept out of the psychiatric services and children who are at home with their parents who I believe wouldn't still be there without our help," says Canavan.

Home-Start, which began in the English city of Leicester in 1973, has spread to 11 countries. Ireland has Home-Start in Cork, Dublin and Tullamore, in Co Offaly, and schemes are about to be set up in Bray, in Co Wicklow, and Lucan, in Co Dublin. Each scheme operates as an independent charity, receiving advice and training from the national co-ordinator, Anna Lynch.

"Every volunteer does one morning a week over nine weeks as their preparation course. Then they are interviewed in their homes, and we get references before a volunteer is matched with a family," she says.

The organisation recently received funding to develop a national office; Lynch would now like to see a bigger budget for local schemes. "There is no money put into early intervention: it is all going to crisis intervention. Yet it is when the families are young that the problems develop. It's that notion of a dollar spent now will save seven later."

The Community Mothers scheme is similar to Home-Start in that it supports young families. It does it in a more structured way, however, with trained volunteers visiting six to eight families once a month for a year.

Funded and co-ordinated by the Eastern Regional Health Authority, it is available to mothers in disadvantaged areas in Counties Dublin, Wicklow and Kildare.

Karin Ó hÓgáin is a community mother in Clondalkin, in west Dublin. "I got involved because I remember well all the mistakes I made with my first baby. The programme helps to reassure first-time mothers that they are doing the best they can and to build their confidence and self-esteem. For example, we'd talk about weaning, encouraging the mother to take her time and relax, which helps to bring down the stress levels."

Learning how to identify the different cries of a new baby, knowing what foods to give babies and finding good childcare are other issues that mothers often discuss.

"You take for granted that children see books, but some children don't see a book until they get to school. We'd say things like start reading to your baby at six months. We'd also say things like it's fine to chat to your baby, even though it might seem strange, as it's an important part of speech and language development."

Community mothers benefit from their free training, and many return to work or studies after their stint volunteering. Ó hÓgáin is completing a degree in community development at NUI Maynooth. Some mothers helped by the scheme also in turn become community mothers.

"Parents are getting younger, and a lot of grandparents are working. Young mothers need to know somebody has reared their children well in their local environment. They also need to know that child rearing is something to be enjoyed and that they are doing an important job," says Teresa Keegan, the family development nurse who co-ordinated the Community Mothers programme in Finglas, north Dublin.

Teresa McDonnell, a community mother, explains what she believes is the key ingredient of the scheme. "When you are met at the door by a state-sponsored professional you can be further undermined, but the community mothers are more one of your equals. The biggest thing a new mother needs is someone to say that you're doing grand and someone who has an understanding that the parent is the real expert in the rearing of their own child."

The multiracial nature of many disadvantaged areas presents new challenges for the Community Mothers programme. Bola Ogunleye is a Nigerian community mother."In Nigeria the new mother doesn't do anything else but eat, feed the baby and go back to bed for two to three months," she says. "Here the mothers have so many things to do. They have to do everything themselves for their babies."

Brenda Molloy, director of Community Mothers, says about 130 mothers are visiting 1,000 parents at any time. Last year 2,370 families were supported by the scheme. "On completion of the programme a child will be more likely to have completed their immunisation, have a healthy diet, be on target in their language, social, cognitive and educational development and be less likely to have had an accident requiring a visit to the hospital," says Molloy. "The mother will also be positive about the first year of her child's life and will have good self-esteem and be eating a healthy diet."

Breastfeeding was also more common among mothers supported by community mothers. "We've had over 30 per cent of our mothers initiating breastfeeding, and 42 per cent still breastfeeding at three months," says Molloy. Parents involved in the scheme often set up breastfeeding support groups and parent-and-toddler groups.

A seven-year follow-up study of Community Mothers found the children were more likely to visit the library each week and less likely to have been bullied at school. Their mothers were more likely to check their children's homework each night and less likely to smack them.

It's the kind of start in life we'd all like for our children.

Community Mothers is at 01-8387122, or e-mail brenda.molloy@erha.ie. Home-Start is at 01-4903237, or e-mail homestartireland@eircom.net. You can also visit www.home-start-int.org