THE SAGA of Maynooth's student bar, and the students' union's determined attempt to get its licence renewed, took an increasingly surreal turn last week in Kilcock District Court, Co Kildare, as Judge John Brophy spoke of students urinating in automatic bank machines and generally interfering with the peaceful tone of life in Maynooth.

Last Tuesday, the union arrived at Kilcock courthouse - which doubles as a medical dispensary, with a specialisation in wart removal - in an effort to have a decision made on the renewal of the licence. The renewal had been objected to by the local superintendent, supported by Judge Brophy.

The students' barrister had been attending Athy court earlier in the morning and was not due to arrive in Kilcock before 11 a.m. Local gardai were informed and it was expected that the case would not be heard until the barrister arrived, so the students waited outside the courthouse as the judge proceeded with the varied business of a local court.

The students were somewhat surprised to learn, moments later, that the judge had heard the case while they were waiting outside, and without any legal representative of the students in attendance. This was the second time that the students had not been able to present their case; in their absence, the judge decided to postpone any decision until January 20th.

Al this point, the students' barrister arrived from Athy, and it was decided that they would apply for bar extensions in the afternoon, since the union can continue to run the bar unless their licence renewal is actually refused by the court.

That afternoon, after some delay, the application for the extensions duly came up. At this point, Judge Brophy informed those present that he had decided at the earlier sitting not to grant any bar extensions to the students. He then explained, in no uncertain terms, why he was not granting any extensions: he said Maynooth's students had been guilty of "blackguardism" over the years, even going so far as to urinate into automatic teller machines.

"In December '94 or '95 I had five students trying to urinate into a pass machine on the Main Street," Judge Brophy told the court.

However, the judge did then grant two bar extensions to the students, solely, he said, on the basis of their barrister's eloquence. The extensions will allow the students to raise funds to pay the £85,000 per annum interest payments on the loan they used to build the bar.

The students are in the Circuit Court tomorrow, where the court will hear the case for an injunction taken against the bar by a local resident. The college and the union have fulfilled a number of conditions agreed with the plaintiff, including the installation of security cameras and noise limitation devices, but a final resolution is unlikely to be achieved until February 27th, when a full hearing of the case is scheduled.

The students did have some good news last week: the local community council voted in favour of supporting the students and their licence application