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Value for Money

Christmas Jumpers

They're tacky, they're scratchy and they're everywhere. Conor Pope reviews four brands of Christmas jumper and puts them to the test.

Fiona Reddan's face
Fiona Reddan
Mon Dec 9 2013 - 00:00

Pennys €12-15

Penneys has a whole lot of things for Christmas – it certainly has a whole lot of Christmas jumpers, so we included two here: one traditional and one that is entirely inappropriate. The traditional one has a smiley reindeer with wobbly eyes and felt reindeers, and at €15 is very good value for money. The second is a grey sweatshirt featuring Santa being kissed by mummy. Except mummy is dressed in a very risqué fashion. Thing is, neither of them look like they're having much fun.


Verdict: Naughty
and nice.
Star rating:***

FUNKY_PRINT

Funky Christmas Jumper €40

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This is a great jumper. It has a lovely white collar, big goldie-looking buttons and a big belt with a nice stitch on it. It is also pleasingly ridiculous. It is very well made and will last multiple Christmases, which should go some way to offsetting the cost. That said, for the price you could get two or three jumpers from Penneys or Tesco. We like the fact that it is an Irish company, however – even if the jumpers have never been introduced to an Irish sewing machine.


Verdict: Puts the fun in funky.
Star rating: ****

Christmas Jumper King €49.50

This is a jumper to fall in love with. It is very thick, and much warmer than any of its rivals. It is incredibly festive and very well-made, so it will last a lifetime. There is also a Velcro patch on the shoulder. What’s this? Well, a bearded chap called Chip can be attached to your shoulder and then draped in Christmas lights, which the Jumper Kings also include. Chip. On your shoulder. Hilarious. Well, mildy humorous at any rate. He does tend to fall off fairly easily, so safety pins are included. And it does come at a cost, but it’s worth it.


Verdict: The best a man can get.
Star rating: *****

Tesco

This is a great jumper. It has a lovely white collar, big goldie-looking buttons and a big belt with a nice stitch on it. It is also pleasingly ridiculous. It is very well made and will last multiple Christmases, which should go some way to offsetting the cost. That said, for the price you could get two or three jumpers from Penneys or Tesco. We like the fact that it is an Irish company, however – even if the jumpers have never been introduced to an Irish sewing machine.


Verdict: Puts the fun in funky.
Star rating: ****

PenneysTesco