The Toyota Land Cruiser, the Motorola radio, the Kalashnikov, and the Ambu bag – the eye-spy staples of disaster bingo. If you spot three, you’re in a humanitarian crisis. All four? You’re in the news and can expect to see Orla Guerin any minute.
In every war zone, every failed state, every biblical catastrophe, as the news cameras pan across the devastation, there’ll be a Land Cruiser – likely in white – with its engine ticking gently, the workhorse of a troubled world.
It’s a link that hasn’t been created by marketing hype, influencers, or product placements. This is forged by necessity, not style. These vehicles are there because their occupants must be, and those same occupants want to be sure of getting away again when their job is done.
The Land Cruiser has garnered a reputation that’s the envy of its rivals. Which is why every new generation is greeted warily by its fan base.
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First up, it’s worth noting that not all Land Cruisers across the world are the same. There are three global iterations of this “car”. In many ways, what distinguishes the different variants is the level of tech and complexity on board, and the engines/emissions.
There is the 70, which is pure hard-core, used by various military outfits and the mining industry, boasting all the muscle you need to venture into uncharted territory.
The 300 is the big-grilled daddy favoured by the most well-heeled in Asia and the Middle East, a mix of luxury touches and off-road endurance.
Then there is the all-rounder 250, which in some markets also carries the Prado name. It’s the 250 that represents Land Cruiser in markets like Ireland, and it’s the one that has received the latest update.
And as we’re not in the midst of an emergency or invasion just yet, we get the added creature comforts layered on top of the standard issue off-road capabilities.
The most striking detail of the new 250 is the styling. Now, style is not a noun normally associated with Land Cruiser. Past generations had all the charisma of a filing cabinet. They were bought by people who had places to be, not Instagram posts to publish.
Don’t fret: the new Land Cruiser hasn’t become stylish – that would be blasphemy. But it’s now more than just a tool. It has acquired a trace of savoir-faire. There’s a whiff of nostalgia, a nod towards the motoring world’s retro obsession right now, with links back to the classic 1984 LJ70. It hints at a history stretching back to the Toyota BJ Series Jeep it inherited from US occupation after the second World War. But it’s subtle: you can completely ignore it if you want.
Of more importance to the wary fan is that the latest generation of 250 retains its off-road prowess.
While I spent most of my time on tarmac, it did get into the mud during my test and on a previous drive in the Scottish Highlands I got to throw it into muddy dykes, up stony inclines that were unsafe under foot and basically into and out from a stinky bog hole.
I’m not going to list the myriad off-road functions on this car, an alphabet soup of abbreviations for titles that don’t really reflect the extent of the car’s capabilities. Crawl Control sounds like a handy feature in traffic, but in fact this is an amazing bit of tech where this behemoth seems to pause, think about the best approach, and then steadily tackle the most ridiculous off-road challenges, one wheel at a time.
Combined with this is a fancy new system that improves wheel articulation – basically, how far the axle can move up and down relative to the chassis. Christened the Stabiliser Disconnect Mechanism, this allows for up to 10 per cent more articulation when off-roading, yet can deliver a more comfortable ride on standard roads.
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Then there is the suite of safety features, from your usual suite of traction and stability controls to trailer sway control (the Platinum version comes with a towing hitch), and of course Multi-Terrain Select, though you don’t actually have to tell it the conditions under tyre as the car’s system will have already figured that out.
The last time I tested this car was over a weekend in the Scottish highlands, where 80 per cent of my driving time was over terrain that would challenge tractors, never mind leather-seated SUVs.
This time, I stayed out of the effluent and drove it like an affluent buyer. In this terrain, this new generation of Land Cruiser is certainly sharper than it ever was before, and far more refined on a long motorway trip than we’ve come to expect of Land Cruiser, whose natural habitat is across sand, shale or mud.
On the black stuff, its honest and rugged traits remain, which means it can roll quite a bit in the bends, and understeers quite a bit if you take a turn too quickly. But you expect nothing less from a car this size, and these issues are nought when you judge it against its other accolades.
In the age of quiet electric power, the 2.8-litre 204hp diesel seems gruff. There is a meaty 500Nm of torque available, and the engine is married to a smooth eight-speed automatic transmission that neatly flicks through the gears to keep the power supply available at the slightest tap of your right toe. But kick down, particularly if you need to overtake, and the cabin – and surrounding countryside – echoes to the Land Cruiser’s agrarian heritage.
Perhaps the biggest difference in the 250 version is the in-car tech and creature comforts.
For the seven-seat passenger version (Land Cruiser is on sale here in this format or else a commercial variant), you get a lot more leather than one might expect. There’s also more soft-touch surfacing, a smart 12.3in touchscreen digital display with Apple CarPlay and Android connectivity, and even a panoramic roof.
There are some nice practical touches, like the rear window on the tailgate that opens independently, so you can drop stuff in without completely opening the boot, and air-conditioned front seats that can heat and cool.
Fancy it as a family car? Well, you certainly have a big enough cabin, though for small children availing of the third row, they might need a step ladder to get in and out.
I have to admit a long-standing love for the Land Cruiser – and for the first time since I got a driving licence, there’s now one that looks good as well, approved for the Instagram generation.
In my Lotto garage, it will always have a parking spot. Yet, buyers need to consider their real needs. Just like you probably don’t need a Motorola radio – or a Kalashnikov for that matter – so you might not require a car that could climb a rock-face.
When it comes to off-roading, it puts the dozens of soft-roader SUVs to shame. When the going gets tough, nothing else comes close. But on the road, there are sharper cars to drive.
It’s also very pricey for the seven-seat passenger version, starting at €140,830, a big leap from the two-seat commercial variant (at €57,192 excluding VAT). Opting for the Platinum version also means you face the hefty annual motor tax bill of €2,400 based on the car’s 280g/km emissions rating. It’s also relatively thirsty, delivering an average fuel consumption during our test driving of 10.9l/100km (26mpg in old money).
That’s all hard to justify unless you buy into the premise that disaster is just around the corner, in which case we’ll all want one of these. If you’re more of an optimist and do all your driving on regular roads, then there are better buys out there.
Lowdown: Toyota Land Cruiser Platinum
Power: A 2,755cc 205hp 500Nm diesel engine mated to an eight-speed automatic transmission.
0-100km/h: 12 secs.
Emissions (motor tax): 280g/km (€2,400).
Fuel consumption: 10.7l/100km (WLTP); (10.9l/100km as tested)
Price: €71,005 as tested. Tayron from €57,546.
Our rating: 3/5.
Verdict: The car you want – but unless you need it, hard to justify at this price.
Price: €140,830 for seven-seat passenger version (€57,192 excluding VAT for commercial).
