For many people, owning a big house in the countryside is a dream come true. This was certainly the case for Elaine Roche when she built her “forever” home in Wexford 17 years ago.
But last year, when her third son left home to study abroad, she decided that the time had come to put the house on the market and find somewhere smaller where she could take stock and decide what her next step would be.
“Brannach went to Budapest in September 2021 to pursue his dream of studying veterinary medicine, and I remember so clearly the evening he left,” says the mother of four boys aged 16 to 21.
“His dad arrived to take him to the airport and it was a beautiful evening with that typical heatwave we often get at that time of the year when the kids go back to school. After the car drove off, I walked up the long avenue back to the house and I was bawling crying — totally broken hearted.
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“Everything looked magical, like something from a movie with the sun glistening on the river, but with only one of the boys left at home, I thought to myself ‘that’s it, I’m done’. I just didn’t want to stay in the house any more with three out of the four boys gone.”
Elaine decided that the time had come to find something smaller for her, and her youngest boy, Rioch.
“There are so many memories for me in the house and I still have all of their stuff from when they were kids,” she says. “They used to hang out in the basement where there is a pool room and gym and now it’s so quiet and I just go down once a week to do a bit of dusting. I think I was a bit naive when my marriage ended 14 years ago, as I didn’t really expect to be on my own at this stage of my life. While not having a partner isn’t the “be all and end all”, I will be alone when Rioch goes and in a big house. That’s not ideal.
“The place is crying out for a family, not just for the hustle and bustle that brings but also because it’s too much work for one person — and the garden alone, needs more than one pair of hands to take care of it.”
Although the mother-of-four still loves her seven bedroom home overlooking the River Slaney, which is now for sale with Savills for €1.5 million, and has so many happy memories there, the time has come to move on.
“When my sons were small it was a fun and busy place, with the basement often full during the winter, while summer days were filled with activity as the boys camped outside, their various friends calling over to play or the hours of fun we had rolling on hay bales after it was cut — and I also enjoyed many long nights sitting outside listening to music and drinking wine.
“But now it’s time I started to think about the future and doing something for me.”
The Wexford home is surrounded by a “moat” and a small pump house and is located on a private lane. And although she is sad to be selling up, Elaine says the property needs a houseful of people living in it again so it can fulfil its full potential as it really is the “ideal place for children to grow up”.
“It will be strange to move on, but for now I’ve decided that no plan is the plan — I’m going to give myself a little time and if I sell, I’ll just wait and think for a while,” she says, adding that her plan is to rent for a while, and take her time thinking about what to do next.
It’s an emotional time for Elaine.
“When I built the house, I never thought about the boys growing up and not being here. Of course it was inevitable, but I didn’t feel it would happen in a blink. Yes, part of me will be a little sad but I’m also excited about my new adventure and the new home I will create. I know that the families who live here after us will feel just as fortunate — because waking up and looking out at the river every day is a blessing.”