First encounters

In conversation with FRANCES O'ROURKE

SINÉAD DESMOND

is a television presenter and co-anchor of TV3's breakfast show, IrelandAM. For most of her career she was a journalist in the UK, where she worked for the Sun newspaper. She still writes for the Sun in the UK and Ireland and for magazines such as Marie Claire and Vogue. She lives in Glenageary, Co Dublin, with her husband, Davy Ryan

‘NOEL WAS ONE of the first people I met in my early days on Ireland AM. It was a big gear shift for me – as a print journalist, you can rewrite a sentence, but this was live TV. I did acclimatise but it was a rough start.

“I’m from Wicklow: I dropped out of Trinity, went to York University in England, ran a small theatre company, then trained as a journalist. I worked for various papers, including the Sun – Rebekah Wade was my boss – then came home for family reasons. I went on Ireland AM to talk about a sex survey I’d commissioned for the Sun here – and, bizarrely, became the show’s sex expert.

“Noel was caring and concerned from the word go. We just really clicked – I remember him being so concerned about me, how I was getting on. I think we’re kindred spirits – both feel life is fleeting, grab it while you can.

“Then we started getting to know each other outside of work. My parents are mad about him and so is Davy, my husband. My parents fell in love with him at my wedding in France, when Noel stole the show – in the best way. He was fabulous, became the de facto host. On the morning of my wedding, I had coffee outside my front door in the sunshine with my mum, dad, aunt Carol and Noel, and it was this calm, lovely moment. He’s very much part of my family now – we all went to visit him in Donegal last summer.

“If you ask anyone what was the best part of the wedding, they’ll say Noel. Without my asking him, he made sure that every single person signed the wedding book, because he knew that would be important to me.

“He’s possibly the kindest person I’ve met in my life. And he’s had an awful lot of tragedy – but you never get a glimmer of self-pity. After the tragedy in which his sister Marie and her husband died, he sacrificed everything to come back to Ireland – he won’t tell you that. But living in Donegal as a gay man was no easy thing.

“When I had my brain haemorrhage [on the set of Ireland AM, in 2008], I think Noel had every single person in Donegal praying for me. We don’t get to see each other as much as we’d like, but we have a good catch up every Tuesday morning. And we’re planning to go to Egypt on holiday in the new year – we both love Cairo. Noel’s had his battles, personally and professionally, but always comes up smiling. I respect him enormously.”

NOEL CUNNINGHAM

covers showbiz news for Ireland AM. He is also customer relations manager for Harvey's Point hotel in Lough Eske, Co Donegal, where he presents its cabaret. From Kilcar, Co Donegal, he is involved in community groups and charity work all over Donegal and in other parts of Ireland. He lives in Killybegs, Co Donegal

‘I KNEW OF SINÉAD because Maura Derrane [former Ireland AM presenter] spoke affectionately about her, but I was a little bit fearful of meeting her – thought she was the real career girl. Then this tornado of energy passed through the building. From the first moment I met her, I felt a connection: initially, I think, it was because she reminded me of my late sister, Marie. She’s always positive, a go-getter, always looks on the bright side. Her glass is always more than half-full.

“I’m from Kilcar in Co Donegal – grew up there in the 1950s and 1960s. After school, I joined the old Jury’s Hotel group, then Trusthouse Forte took me off to London. It was all happening in London in the late 1970s, early 1980s – it was terribly exciting.

“In my 20s I became the youngest general manager in the Trusthouse Forte chain . . . I took a break and worked for three years on cruise ships. I came back to London, then later spent seven years all over southeast Asia working for a hotel school.

“In 1996, I came back to Ireland because my beloved sister Marie and her husband were killed in a car accident in Donegal. Their three small children were orphaned, and another of my sisters, Geraldine, was severely injured. Our family’s lives changed forever, and I came home to Donegal for good.

“I had a fear of not being accepted: being gay when I was growing up left awful insecurities . . . I know from the number of people who approach me for help that homophobia is still a huge problem: not a week goes by without me being contacted by young people who are having problems, or their parents, and it’s a source of pride to me that I can be of some help.

“Donegal – and my local community in particular – since I came home has been very warm and accepting.

“I consider it a gift, having met Sinéad: through her I’ve been able to appreciate the gift of my nephews, nieces and family, because she has such an emphasis placed on family. Whatever about glamour and glitz, the important thing is to have close family and friends around that you trust implicitly – it’s what life is all about. Sinéad has helped me greatly with that.

“I have a lot of acquaintances but can honestly say that I can count on one hand those I consider dear friends. If tomorrow I was in terrible trouble, no matter what awful things I’d done, I could go to Sinéad with confidence. She’s an extraordinary girl.”