House Rules: I’m being stalked by unicorns. For real

It crept up so slowly that at first I was unaware, but now I’m completely convinced I’m being stalked by a mythical beast. Legend has it that the unicorns were off having fun when the flood came, and so missed being saved by Noah’s Ark, but in Ireland’s design and trinket shops they’re everywhere.

At Designist a cute card tells you that “you may have stopped believing in unicorns, but they never stopped believing in you” (€3.50 shop.designist.ie). Over in Urban Outfitters, you can opt for a tasteful pastel mug for €15, or twin glasses with rearing unicorns for €19. If you’re feeling louche, try a unicorn dressing gown with “You Wish” stitched above the magnificent beast for €45 – reduced from €91 (urbanoutfitters.com).

The unicorn fad isn't new. In Renaissance times, "unicorn horn" was highly prized as a cure-all, an antidote to poison, a protection from murderers, a fix for depression, an aphrodisiac, a test for virginity, and a symbol of power. At its height, "unicorn horns" cost more than 11 times their weight in gold. Spot them in Westminster Abbey in London, St Mark's in Venice and at Saint-Denis in Paris – except they're not real: everything was actually made from the long tooth of the Narwhal. You can see why they did it – somehow "medium sized whale" doesn't have quite the same ring to it as "magical non-existent horned horse".

Nevertheless, the deception worked: Danish kings sit on the Unicorn Throne, and unicorn horn appears in the imperial crown of the Austrian Empire, and the scabbard of Charles the Bold. Charles the Bold, also known as Charles the Rash, was Duke of Burgundy until his untimely death in battle in the 1400s, when even his unicorn/narwhal gear couldn't save him.

Find yours on Etsy. com with a Dreaming of Unicorns pillow (€13.25) from the OldEnglishCo; a black and gold paper unicorn plaque requiring (apparently) minimal origami skills for €54.75 from Papertrophy; or if you have a pony whom you can persuade to stand still, PandaKittyStudios do a unicorn horn on elastic for €13.14.

To push the boat out, my favourite comes from that lovely home of all things quirkily wonderful, Dust. A so-real-it’s-almost-alarming unicorn head with full-length horn from its faux taxidermy range is €850. dust.ie.