In her debut book Is Monogamy Dead? comedian, musician and broadcaster Rosie Wilby quotes Alain de Botton: "We seem to know far too much about how love starts, and recklessly little about how it might continue." This is part-memoir, part-discussion, and Wilby investigates everything from lesbian polyamory to straight marriage with wit and vulnerability, giving a fresh lexicon for understanding modern love. "Compersion" for instance, means being aroused by your partner being with someone else (jealousy's happy cousin), a "metamour" is your partner's partner, and a "one-penis policy" is self-explanatory. Polyamory, romantic friendships and platonic marriages have always existed, but Wilby offers thoughtful perspective, humour and navigational tips. She argues that communication is crucial, whatever the circumstances. This is the valuable point the book makes, if it takes the scenic route doing so, that effective communication is a lifeline for intimacy. And that can be with your partner, a lover, your metamour or – in what the conclusion of the book posits as a radical concept – with the love of your life.
