Window dressing

The volleyball world championship's fashion police struck again on Tuesday, fining seven teams £3,000 each for ignoring its new dress code. The governing body want to make the sport more "sexy" by using the athletes' bodies as bait for lucrative contracts.

During the women's championships, which ended last week, five teams were also fined for refusing to wear skin-tight, swimsuit-style uniforms.

Volleyball's world governing body, the FIVB, said in a statement that the men's outfits, "do not comply with the FIVB uniforms standards for international competitions. The shirts are too loose and do not fit the body, therefore a £3,000 fine, deductible from team prize money, is imposed."

The men can also expect a dressing down from FIVB president Ruben Acosta, who launched a scathing attack on the women for their resistance to the new uniforms which have been designed to try and help make the sport more attractive to television, sponsors and advertisers. In an effort to encourage the men to offer their buttocks and the women both their breasts and buttocks to promote grocery chains and fizzy drinks, the FIVB is offering a £10,000 prize to entice teams to adopt the new figure-hugging uniforms. Very edifying indeed.