Planet Golf

A round-up of other golf news

I caught a monster, and it was this big

MOVE OVER Tiger, there's a new swinger in town. Forget Rory McIlroy, the hottest ticket in world golf is assuredly 67-year-old North Korean leader-dictator-tyrant (delete to taste) Kim Jong-il. If Kim, "Dear Leader" to his friends and adoring subjects, decides to spend less energy on nuclear testing and more time focusing on his game, global dominance beckons.

Depending on whom you listen to, Kim carded between five and 11 holes-in-one (hey, who's counting?) the first time he played the game, and has gone around the country's only 18-hole course in a none too shabby 34. That's an impressive 38-under-par on the mammoth 7,700-yard layout. Eat your heart out Tiger.

Kim, who lists composing operas, piloting jet fighters and directing globally acclaimed films among his other hobbies, is far too modest a man to crow about his freakish prowess. Fortunately, state media and officials have been on hand to let the world know exactly how good the little fella is.

Obama gets into the swing

SPEAKING OF world leaders and the game of golf, it seems Barack Obama is the latest US president to have caught the bug. Obama, who appointed Tiger Woods as a US goodwill ambassador, has been photographed practising his putting stroke on the White House lawn and is said to squeeze in a round whenever his hectic schedule allows.

It would appear, however, that the world's most powerful man is still playing catch-up to his predecessor, George W Bush, in terms of ability. Comparing footage of their swings, the Daily Telegraph concluded that Obama has plenty of work to do, observing that he "appears nervy as he addresses the ball and then lifts his head before the shot is completed, as he finishes with limp shoulders at odds with his impressive, unshakeable stance behind a podium".

Bush, on the other hand, has "a sturdy, almost fluid swing that would not sit uncomfortably with most club professionals".

Whether either man has chosen to abuse their power and adopt Bill Clinton-style "Billigans" – similar to a Mulligan, only Clinton used to hit as many tee-shots as he liked until he was happy with one – was not reported.

Controversial choices for cup

THE DOWNPOURS and subsequent delays at Celtic Manor over the weekend showed just how vulnerable the 2010 Ryder Cup venue is to the elements. Invariably, it has also re-ignited the debate over the venue’s suitability to stage a Ryder Cup and the nuances of the course selection process.

Questions have again been asked as to whether the biennial showpiece should be staged on a track many consider mediocre at best when there are so many superior courses on this side of the Atlantic. Sure, the new Twenty Ten course is a vast improvement on the previous, heavily-criticised, incarnation, but it still falls short of firing the imagination.

It seems we will continue to be saddled with inferior Ryder Cup courses, as the choice for 2014, the PGA Centenary at Gleneagles, is another controversial selection.

Far from being even the third-best course in Scotland, it is merely the third-best at Gleneagles.

Media favourite to get the blame

POOR SERGIO Garcia. When the golfing gods aren’t conspiring against him the media are on his back or the courses are badly set up. Indeed, his shortfalls can be put down to anything, as long as it is not El Nino himself.

Now, even his love life is coming between him and greatness. Dumped by Greg Norman’s daughter, Morgan-Leigh, in March, the pain of the split has led to a bout of soul searching from the out-of-form Spaniard.

But while Garcia might have expected a little rich tea and sympathy, having laid his soul bare, compassion has been in short supply.

“Who will Sergio blame next?” asked Derek Lawrenson in the Daily Mail last week.

“Given the 29-year-old has been mercilessly ridiculed around the world for his latest, toe-curling ode to self-pity that made him sound like a pimply boy of 15, the odds-on favourite must be the media.”

Golf slang of the week

The Glen Miller – Refers to a shot over water that kept low and is never seen again.