Groan of the week

"THE Irish FA are pushing their luck. Instead of being grateful that they can come over to England and recruit any promising player whose granny once had a Guinness, they are now demanding nothing but the best for FIFA's laughable Under-20 tournament in Nigeria."

"It's insolence from a national body that is largely parasitic on the English game, and shows nothing but contempt for the clubs who develop these players and pay their wages." Who else other than David Mellor would be so well qualified to discuss the attributes of a parasite? Sad to report, though, just days after he shared these enlightened views with the readers of his London Evening Standard column, the one-time Tory high-flier announced he was giving up his job as presenter of BBC Radio 5's football phone-in. Nothing to do with the Beeb's reported outrage at his passionate (and lengthy), live-on-air defence of Chelsea's decision to stand by convicted sex offender Graham Rix, whose job as assistant to Gianluca Vialli will be waiting for him when he gets out of prison. No connection at all, we're sure. Cheerio David.