President caught with his saggy pants down

Photographers waiting on the beach outside the French presidential holiday chΓteau at BrΘganτon couldn't believe it when President Jacques Chirac appeared on the balcony one August morning in his underwear ("But not chic underpants," the Canard EnchaȨnΘ reported, "more the saggy kind").

Before the photographers could adjust their telephoto lenses, Chirac went inside, only to reappear a few minutes later completely naked and holding binoculars, with which he seemed to be watching the young ladies lolling on the Shumacher brothers' yacht.

A long discussion ensued among the photographers, two of whom work for international news agencies, one for a local newspaper and one for a paparazzi agency. All feared being black-listed by the ElysΘe Palace, and they agreed not to sell the photos, which nevertheless found their way to Paris Match magazine.

Alain Genestar, the director of Match, said he looked at the pictures for 10 seconds and decided they were "humiliating, degrading". Meanwhile, the president's office discreetly warned French newspapers that the images must not be published. How long, the Canard wondered, before a British tabloid gets hold of them? The Charles de Gaulle aircraft-carrier could block the mouth of the Thames to dissuade them, the Canard suggested.