Give Me a Crash Course in ... Lent

Okay, my Gen Z young friend, do you know that Lent begins on Wednesday? It does? The day after Pancake Tuesday?

Yes, the day after Pancake Tuesday. Do you know what Lent means? Something to do with loans? You know, like it says in the Bible, “neither a borrower nor a lender be.”

That’s Shakespeare. Hamlet, Polonius, to be accurate. Lent is a time of fasting and abstinence when Christians do penance for their sins, making up for disappointing God. You do know what sin is? Wasn’t that a song? You know, like, Pet Shop Boys’ It’s a Sin?

How do you know about the Pet Shop Boys? They were long before you were born Mam sings it. It’s her party piece. I even know some of the words: “When I look back upon my life / It’s always with a sense of shame...”

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You know what shame is? Yes, losing a penalty shoot-out. Dad says they should be banned.

Lent has nothing to do with any of that. It is a 40-day period of fast and abstinence leading to Easter, when Christians can give up things they like as penance for doing bad things formerly known as sin. Catholics over 14 are even expected to abstain from meat on Ash Wednesday and all Fridays in Lent Greta Thunberg should be happy about that. So it’s sort of like Ramadan then, fasting and all that?

Muslims are not supposed to eat or drink from sunrise to sunset during Ramadan. That is not expected of Christians. It might have been like that once, but nowadays it’s about cutting down, doing without. Some people do positive things, like helping out around the house, or helping older people, maybe even collecting for Trócaire I knew there was something – Trócaire! That was Lent in our school every year. We were always the first class to fill the Trócaire box every year.

It’s for Somalia this year. And on Ash Wednesday some Catholics get ash on their foreheads in the shape of a cross. The priest says “Remember you are dust, and to dust you shall return.” It’s a reminder that life is short, and also why the priest tells them, “Repent, and believe in the Gospel” Wait, don’t politicians do that – get ash on their foreheads?

Not all. One was famous for doing so. He recently rejoined Fianna Fáil after doing his penance. What are you giving up for Lent? Hadn’t thought about it. Have only got as far as Pancake Tuesday in my head. I love pancakes smothered in syrup. With ice cream. Mint flavour. One year I piled chocolate chips on top of that. Mam said it was sinful. I like that sort of sin.

It’s good for body and soul to cut down, be selfless, help older people – which is most people in your case – and be less self-centred. Be a better person I can buy that, but why the 40 days?

It was the period Jesus spent in the desert fasting and being tempted by the Devil. He promised to make Jesus ruler of the world if he bowed down to him, making the Devil great again. Jesus was not for turning. His values were not of this world I like Jesus. You know, ‘love your neighbour’ and all that stuff. But I can’t see the point in starving.

No one is saying you should. If you want to you can get fit, study or work harder, better yourself. And, if you’re Irish, there’s a break. You can let loose on St Patrick’s Day I usually do anyway.