Mary Hannigan's sideways look at the world of soccer
England's Drogba raises a few eyebrows
MORE THAN a few eyebrows were wiggled in puzzlement last week when Timemagazine included Didier Drogba in its list of The World's Most Influential People, the Chelsea man talking his place alongside the likes of President Obama, Apple chief executive Steve Jobs and, eh, Lady Gaga.
Inevitably, it all led to a bit of a rumpus on Time’s website, fans of Samuel Eto’o, who they regard as significantly more commendable and influential, on and off the pitch, most notably aggrieved. “Err, who the **** exactly did Drogba sleep with to end up on the list,” asked one particularly miffed chap, in an uncalled-for kind of way, while others focused their ire on the author of the short article about the player.
“Like church officials confronted with Galileo’s telescope, football’s high priests can’t quite make sense of Didier Drogba,” it read, noting that “this sensitive young man already carries so much of Africa’s weight on his wide, sturdy shoulders”.
Picture a world where Didier Drogba is a “sensitive young man. You’ve entered the Twilight Zone,” read one of the replies. Alas, several of those leaving comments chose to be rather abusive to each other, the chief allegation being that their opponents on the issue knew nothing about football. That’s why our hearts went out to this fella: “Would love to see USA upset Drogba’s England in game One of the World Cup.”
Not quite quote of the week but still quite good . . .
“Graham Dorrans is a good player but I didn’t know the club was interested in him. I just found out in the newspaper and it was quite a surprise.”
– Gianfranco Zola on how he learnt that West Ham had bid for the West Brom midfielder. Respect.
“There are some of the best players in the world in the Premier League and certainly some of the best managers in the world, and don’t forget there is also the Wolves and Mick McCarthy.”
– West Brom manager Roberto Di Matteo sends his love to the club’s Midlands’ neighbours.
“The manager will die on the bench. It is his destiny.”
– Patrice Evra forecasts the manner of Alex Ferguson's departure from United.
"I think there are three coaches who are the best in the world – Fabio Capello, Jose Mourinho and Guus Hiddink."
– Andrey Arshavin’s warm tribute to Arsene Wenger.
Quote of the week
“Reporter: “Gordon, do you Twitter?”
Gordon Strachan: “Do I ****! Twitter is for ****ing cowards who cannae speak to people. Keyboard cowboys.”
– The Daily Mirror’s account of Strachan’s Tweet-free press conference at Middlesbrough.
Boy George switches affections from U2's Mullen to United's Vidic
WHEN BOY George first heard U2’s I still haven’t found what I’m looking for, this was the gist of his response: “Bono, you should look behind your drum-kit.”
It seems, though, that George has switched his affections from Larry Mullen, 23 years on.
In an interview with the singer on Sony Ericsson’s YouTube channel he was asked the marginally bizarre question: “If you had a celebrity Siamese twin who would you choose?” Without hesitation, he replied: “It would have to be Nemanja Vidic from Manchester United.”
It’s an image that will, quite possibly, haunt the Serb for the rest of his days on earth.
Prompt U-turn on proposed Old Firm clash in Boston
SPEAKING OF controversial football-related matters in American publications: a Boston Globe editorial about the proposal to stage an Old Firm derby at the city’s Fenway Park went down a treat with Rangers, the paper opposing the plan because of the club’s supporters’ “long history of violence on their travels”.
In an, eh, balanced piece, that detailed the occasions over the years that Rangers’ fans have caused havoc, it was claimed that “if their arch-rivals have dragged the name of Glasgow through the mud, it must be said that Celtic fans have done their best to restore the good name”.
The inaccurate suggestion, though, that “tensions between Celtic and Rangers fans” caused the 1971 Ibrox Disaster, in which 66 people died, was the final straw for the club, which explains why “Sorry, the page you have requested does not exist at this address” was the message later in the week on the Globe’s website when you went looking for the editorial.
The author of the piece promptly issued an apology. “I remain hopeful that the Old Firm will play in the Boston area this summer so the citizens of Boston can experience the atmosphere which is unique to this fixture,” it concluded. That’s what you might call a U-turn.
Number of the week 13
THAT’S HOW many inches taller Aalesund striker Tor Hogne Aaroy is than Rosenborg midfielder Anthony Annan, which might explain why they didn’t go head-to-head when they tussled in a recent Norwegian league game. They did, though, go teeth-to-chest.
Allegedly.
“He nibbled my chest,” claimed Aaroy who, at six feet, eight and a half inches, is one of the world’s tallest footballers. Later reports, though, suggested Annan bit his tummy, but Aaroy’s manager insisted that was wide of the mark too.
“He pulled at one of our players’ undercarriage and he bit others,” he said. “This sounds more like the kind of treatment players get from female shop assistants in nightclubs at the weekend than from opposing players on a match-day.” Jeez.
