The busy executive who books himself an ambitious itinerary for his golfing holiday and then spends the entire two weeks worrying about how things are going back at the shop would surely find a commiserative soul in Christy O'Connor Jnr.
Three weeks after his victory at the State Farm Classic in Maryland, the Galwayman is back in Ireland to play his first and most important Seniors event in these islands, the British Seniors Open. But he already finds himself fretting about how the rest of the boys are getting on back in the United States.
"I stood 22nd on the money list when I came over, but missing these few weeks won't help my position," explained O'Connor. "I wouldn't be surprised if I'm no longer in the top 30 when I go back in August, so there's work to be done."
Unlike the regular USPGA Tour, where the top 125 players automatically retain their cards, only the first 31 players on the earnings list are exempt for the following year on the American Seniors Tour. With his win in Baltimore, O'Connor has already made nearly $400,000 and is well on his way to topping his best year on the regular European Tour, but he has calculated that he will need to have earned $630,000 by the end of 1999 to gain exempt status for next year.
"Once I reach that figure, I can relax a bit, but until then the pressure will be on," said O'Connor. "Those 31 spots are absolutely sacrosanct. The fellow who finishes 32nd would happily pay $100,000 to switch places with the guy in 31st."
A win in this week's tournament at Royal Portrush will provide the winner with an enter into next year's British Open at St Andrews, but it won't help O'Connor's prospects in the United States. Although the regular American and European tours, somewhat sensibly, agreed several years ago to count the US and British Open results toward one another's respective tour standings, that decision does not apply to the Seniors events.
"And I think that's a mistake," said O'Connor. "Many of the top players on the American Seniors Tour have told me they would love to come over and play in the British Seniors Open. If the results counted in the standings back in the States, I know a lot of them would be here, but unless and until that changes you're not going to see them in this event. I know I'm losing ground just by being here."
O'Connor is also committed to play next week's invitational at Wentworth, after which he plans to return to the US "and play three or four tournaments on the trot" in the hope of securing his position.
Everything that happens this year is, of course, all part of Plan B. O'Connor turned 50 last August, and his original, carefully-mapped strategy had him going to the US last November and playing his way onto the tour through Qualifying School. When his 17-year-old son, Darren, was killed in a car accident last September, the shattered and grief-stricken father abandoned the idea.
He didn't start playing Seniors events in the US until the spring, and then it was always by the grace of sponsors' exemptions. He made the cut in the US Seniors Open, "but didn't do much", then had fourth, second, and third-place finishes before his breakthrough in Baltimore on the Fourth of July. When he holed his putt to win on that hot and steamy afternoon, tears of joy ran down his cheeks. He lifted his face heavenward, and dedicated the win to Darren.
"It's been a wonderful experience and I've enjoyed every minute of it," said O'Connor of his new life in America. "There are certain players I'd seen all along over the years, but I've been able to renew acquaintances . . . There is definitely more camaraderie on this tour than on the regular tours, either in the US or in Europe."
The State Farm championship leaves Christy Jnr exempt for one year, but if he doesn't secure his spot on the money list, he realises he could be right back where he started by next July - and it won't be any easier then. By this time next year, Tom Watson, Tom Kite and Lanny Wadkins will all have turned 50 and taken their places on the old-timers' tour. (Ironically, all three were members of the 1989 Ryder Cup team whose hopes were dashed by O'Connor's two-iron to the 18th that memorable afternoon at the Belfry a decade ago.)
Just as that shot utterly changed his life on this side of the Atlantic, it has provided a readymade introduction to American galleries.
"They may not know another single thing about my career, but they all remember that," said O'Connor, who is asked about it only several times a day.
When he mapped out his strategy for the over-50 side of his life, O'Connor knew he would have to strike while the iron was hot, and that is no less true now. The shelf life of a senior pro is typically less than five years. The Seniors events were originally conceived to provide golfing fans with an opportunity to watch the likes of Arnold Palmer and Gary Player in competitive situations, but within a couple of years Miller Barber had turned 50 and was beating them all. It's not only that certain aspects of a golfer's game diminish considerably between 50 and 55. There's also the fact that each year brings a fresh crop of 50-year-olds - and next year's graduating class will be more formidable than most. "I pray to God I'm finished by the time I'm 55 anyway," O'Connor said. "I want to get out while I can still play golf and not just hang on. I have several other things going - I've just designed my 22nd course in Ireland, for instance - and need to get on with the rest of my life."
Although he is headed for what promises to be his best year in terms of earnings, to Christy Jnr the money is just a means of keeping score.
"Apart from where it puts me on the exempt list, I never think about the money," he said. "If you play good golf, you'll make a lot of money, and if you don't play good golf, you shouldn't be out there."
And Christy is playing very good golf indeed. Somehow he had never played a full round at Royal Portrush ("I'm embarrassed to admit I'd only played nine holes of this magnificent course.") before Tuesday's Pro-Am, when he birdied three of the first five holes. Then, in a hurricane-force gale, he hung on to par the final three holes while his three bedraggled team-mates were staggering home. His team finished tied not only on the same score, but with the same back nine, same last six, same last three, and same final hole score as the second-placed team. Under the PGA formula the next step was hole-by-hole matchplay, and a three on the first from a visiting American journalist broke the deadlock. Whatever else I may do in life, I can always say I got Christy O'Connor Jnr his first Seniors win in Ireland.
