The theatre of the Premiership turned pure pantomime here yesterday, only somebody forgot to remind referee Andy D'Urso "he's behind you." Had the shout gone up, it might have saved a lot of embarrassment all round.
In fairness to D'Urso the lasting memory of this absorbing contest - an afternoon that could have serious repercussions for that serial referee-baiter John Gregory - owed more to him being in the wrong place at the wrong time rather than any indiscretion on the official's part.
It happened in the seventh minute, took a matter of seconds and will be shown on Christmas blooper videos for years to come.
Peter Schmeichel had just gathered possession inside his penalty area and immediately sought to turn defence into attack with one of his rapier throws upfield. What happened next took everyone by surprise.
The ball hit the retreating D'Urso in the back, nearly knocking him off his feet, and bounced down for Jari Litmanen, 30 yards out, to caress the ball nonchalantly into the unguarded net.
"You can't legislate for a goal like that. It was a bit of a freak effort and Litmanen will never get an easier opportunity to score," Gregory said afterwards.
Indeed, a more freakish goal it is difficult to remember, and Litmanen wore a wry smile as he trotted back to the centre circle. D'Urso could do little else but shrug his shoulders. Peter Schmeichel, his cheeks as red as his strawberry nose, was aghast.
Incensed, Gregory would be banished to the stands before half-time.
D'Urso's unwitting intervention prompted some to wonder whether referees should be allowed Fantasy Football points for playing "assists"?
"I've heard about referees trying to get in on the act but that was taking it too far," Gregory ventured afterwards, presumably tongue in cheek. "Mind you, he brought it down really well. It was great skill. I just thought it was a bit strong to run to the Kop to celebrate."
A quick glance at the front of the programme reminded us that it was, indeed, St Stephen's Day, rather than April Fool's Day, but Gregory's humour came through gritted teeth. D'Urso, remember, is the referee of whom Gregory once infamously threatened to "punch his lights out".
When the home players finally shook their heads clear it was with telling impact. Liverpool's defence had barely been stretched in the opening exchanges but a well-crafted move along Villa's right flank culminated in George Boateng creating Juan Pablo Angel's first clear sight of goal. His angled shot was too powerful for Liverpool goalkeeper Jerzy Dudek to hold and the rebound fell invitingly for Lee Hendrie to fire inside the near post from eight yards.
Had Darius Vassell aimed a volley further away from Dudek soon afterwards they would have taken the lead but, as it was, they were grateful to be on level terms at half-time.
D'Urso, again played the villain's role, at least in the eyes of those on the Holte End in front of whom, after consulting with his assistant Ray Gould, he ruled Boateng had upended Steven Gerrard inside the penalty area.
It looked a sound decision, even if Gerrard's fall was exaggerated, but Litmanen's accuracy deserted him from the penalty spot, wrong-footing Schmeichel only for his effort to come back off the post.
That did not stop Gregory appearing on the touchline to berate D'Urso, Gould and the fourth official Phil Dowd; anyone, in fact, who was willing to listen. Finally, the manager was ordered to leave the dug-out. "I was sent off," he confirmed later, and a summons from the English FA is all but guaranteed.
"I could possibly be in more trouble now. At least I kept out of trouble in the second half," said Gregory.
It was not until the 68th minute, after a lengthy spell of Villa domination during which Ian Taylor had struck a post, that Liverpool introduced Nicolas Anelka and, though the Frenchman played only a peripheral role, they were ahead again within five minutes.
Patrik Berger's ball was flighted perfectly for Vladimir Smicer to nip between Steve Staunton and Olof Mellberg before clipping a left-foot shot past Schmeichel.
"It's a great win," said Phil Thompson, reflecting on Liverpool's first victory in four attempts. "We controlled the game. We looked like we had 15 people out there sometimes." Well, 12 certainly.
ASTON VILLA: Schmeichel, Samuel (Stone 81), Mellberg, Staunton, Wright, Boateng, Merson, Hendrie (Taylor 47), Kachloul, Angel, Vassell. Subs Not Used: Dublin, Enckelman, Barry. Booked: Boateng. Goals: Hendrie 21.
LIVERPOOL: Dudek, Carragher, Hyypia, Henchoz, Riise, Smicer (McAllister 86), Hamann, Gerrard (Murphy 77), Berger, Litmanen (Anelka 68), Owen. Subs Not Used: Kirkland, Wright. Goals: Litmanen 9, Smicer 73.
Referee: A D'Urso (Billericay).
