From the Orange Tigers of Kosice to the Lion of Vienna, in the guise of the pristine Nat Lofthouse stand, there are no easy matches for Manchester United. But in Bolton's new stadium on Saturday, the big game hunters were in danger of becoming the prey.
This was not so much two points dropped for the leaders as a point gained against lowly Wanderers, who are already engaged in a desperate battle for survival.
Alex Ferguson had picked the same side who won in the Champions League in midweek. Yet on an afternoon when it seemed the law of the jungle would prevail, it must have been galling for the manager to find his way blocked by a fish - Mark Fish, the South African international who had turned down United over a year ago in favour of a move to Lazio. At the time he had unpleasant things to say about the centre-halves with whom he was meant to compete for a place.
"The biggest insult of all was watching Steve Bruce and Gary Pallister," was the gist of it. "I can't say who was worse because to me they were both average."
Sure enough, someone had a bone to pick with Fish and in the third minute David Beckham hoisted in a free-kick, Pallister jumped and the newcomer was left picking blades of grass from his teeth. That was par for the course as a derby welcome but worse was to follow as Pallister continued to be the centre of attention. FIFA had invited trouble by labelling the afternoon Fair Play Day and, as the game atrophied in a war of attrition, trouble duly arrived.
In the 32nd minute, as tempers grew increasingly frayed around him, Pallister got into an off-the-ball tangle with Nathan Blake which exploded into a flurry of fists and this time Durkin flourished the red card - twice.
Blake's manager Colin Todd had no sympathy for the striker. "If someone raises their hands they deserve to get sent off and I thought the referee handled it well."
As the incident was sparked by a despicable stamp by Blake on the defender's troublesome Achilles tendon, it seemed that Pallister was hard done by. Ferguson thought so and said that the referee had promised to review the incident on film.
The only other incidents to relieve the dreary sequence of fouls and bookings were two shots against the woodwork - one from Per Frandsen in the 28th minute, another an opportunist stab by United's Andy Cole in the 73rd.
All in all it was a defender's day and the £2 million debutant Fish was rightly voted Man of the Match.
Guardian service