OPINION:The poem below was written by Paul Durcan in 2006 but was not published at that time. It is his response to two controversies within the Catholic Church.
The first concerned criticism of a priest, Father Iggy O'Donovan of Drogheda, for inviting his Church of Ireland counterpart, the Rev Michael Graham, to celebrate the Eucharist with him. Fr O'Donovan was subsequently criticised by the Catholic Archbishop of Dublin, Dr Diarmuid Martin, who said: "The Eucharist is not to be manipulated for personal or social agendas."
The second was over an invitation to a priest, Father Charles Curran, to speak at a conference in Maynooth. Fr Curran had been deemed by the authorities as not suitable and not eligible to exercise the functions of professor of Catholic theology, Dr Martin said at the time.
Earlier this month, the Irish Catholicnewspaper published criticism by an unnamed Dublin priest at Dr Martin's alleged lack of consultation with colleagues before taking decisions. "He may well be a bureaucrat of eminent distinction in Roman circles," wrote the priest, "but his lack of pastoral tact with his priests is alarming".
A debate has ensued, prompting Paul Durcan to submit his 2006 poem for publication now.
Archbishop Dr Martin Lays Down the Party Line
Alas! What boots it with incessant care To tend the homely slighted shepherd's trade?
ON HEARING that a priest had had the cheek
To perform a Christian act
Celebrating the Eucharist with a Church of Ireland minister
In an RC Church on Easter Sunday on the banks of the Boyne -
The Archbishop of Dublin, Dr Diarmuid Martin,
Moved speedily to swat the offending priest.
Last night speaking in Ferns
He began: "This is a very serious matter"* -
KGB-speak for "This will not be bloody well tolerated".
He went on to denounce the idea of the free, creative, individual
conscience:
"Today we are often confronted, whatever their personal intention,
With individuals who feel they can create
A new image of the message of Jesus on the basis of individualistic
gestures."*
Ah yes, the old individualistic gestures, those insubordinate,
individualistic gestures
That have been the bane of all party men from Rome to Moscow,
From Moscow to Beijing, from Beijing to Dublin.
No, we'll have none of your individualistic gestures in Dublin
Or anywhere in Ireland and you can take that from me as final.
The bristling, hooped comrade archbishop concluded:
"We cannot have Jesus without the church," meaning:
We cannot have Marx without the Communist Party.
The Archbishop of Dublin, Dr Martin,
Known to party faithful as Doc Martin the Boot,
Admired for the speed with which he can dart across a crowded
room,
Swift of heel and ball is he of the archiepiscopal five o'clock
shadow,
A PR agency's dream prelate,
Ratzinger's man in Dublin, the enforcer's enforcer,
A virtuoso of the Ratzinger faction,
Underneath a demotic Dublin accent
Modulated to high-definition street-cred,
Operates an elite larynx to annihilate freedom of conscience.
Ratzinger (now calling himself Benedict XVI
Despite the fact that he is opposed to all things Benedictine -
Most especially Benedictine theology and spirituality)
Is the General Secretary of the Roman Catholic Church
Who is held in high regard by commentators
As a worthy successor of the foremost General Secretaries
Of the last one hundred years -
Khrushchev, Kosygin, Brezhnev, Andropov.
Comrade Archbishop Dr Martin, a responsible member
Of the 500-strong Central Committee of the Vatican Politburo,
Last night concluded his denunciation
Of the priest who dared to commit a Christian act by stating:
"The individualistically chosen Jesus is an imaginary Jesus."*
Like all staunch comrades Archbishop Martin has no more time
For the imagination than he has for the individual.
On we go! Backwards! Mao Man!
Archbishop Dr Martin is a Great Leader of Post-Modern Ireland.
A week later Archbishop Dr Martin achieved a spectacular double
By extinguishing two theologians with the one put-down
In dissociating himself from the celebratory conference organised
To honour Ireland's long-serving, long-suffering, conscientious
Professor of Moral Theology, Fr Enda McDonagh,
And at the same time also denouncing the principal guest lecturer,
Fr Charles Curran of the USA.
From his Kremlin palace in Drumcondra, Doc Martin the Boot issued a
ukase:
"Rev Charles Curran . . . has been declared
By the Congregation for the Doctrine of Faith
As not suitable and not eligible
To exercise the functions of professor of Catholic theology."*
Archbishop Dr Martin is a Great Globaliser of Post-Modern Ireland
Who has spent much of his life not in Ireland
But in Rome, wining and dining and defining
The finer points of the diplomacy of dogmatic authoritarianism
And promoting the creed of globalisation.
While Ireland was suffering thirty years of sectarian fratricide
Archbishop Martin was shepherding in the shadows in Rome.
Straighten up, Boot, straighten up and when you get into bed tonight,
As you squeeze into your night-frock,
Whatever you do, don't be individualistic!
God have mercy on you if I catch you being individualistic.
If I catch you being even an eenshy-weenshy bit individualistic,
I'll defrock you and throw you back into the River Tiber
Where you can boot away the rest of your individualistic days.
April 24th, 2006
* Irish Timesreports quoting comments by Archbishop Martin