NOVELTY FOR NOVELTY'S SAKE

There was a time when you used to stick a piece of shiny metal possibly brass, or some mixture - into the end of your hose, connect…

There was a time when you used to stick a piece of shiny metal possibly brass, or some mixture - into the end of your hose, connect it with the tap by an equally simple device, then water your plants. And this simple looking few inches of tubing could by a slight twist of the hand, throw over your plants either a thin mist of water, or a heavy shower of water. More, it could be turned into a jet to reach one solitary treelet in the back ground, behind a barrel or something of the kind. There were other gradations of power and reach and density. It was a masterly device. To fit it into your usual half inch hose, you just pushed. It was shaped so that it could not fall out. The device which attached to the tap, the source of your water, was simpler even. It consisted of a cup shaped bit of metal with a rubber lining, from which projected about an inch and a half of piping of the same metal, which likewise was simply pushed into the other end of your hose. A search the other day in two brilliantly equipped and most helpful establishments brought much head shaking.

"Those went out long ago." Why? They didn't know, but produced various, and not at all too expensive modern day equivalents. Dammit, weren't the two first produced in the shape of a hand gun. You pulled on the trigger and, according to the setting of a disc, you got your mist, or your shower or your jet. And this is not for the purely senile. It's the norm for today. The one bought was of plastic. The first time it drops on the path, of course, it's a goner. Or someone stands on it. You can also buy one in metal which costs something under £20 and which will be durable.

But why did manufacturers and retailers get the idea that a simple device which always worked, should be replaced by a fancy yoke, which also looks ridiculous.

Now, naturally, the next hardware shop approached will say "Of course" and produce a drawer full of the old stock. Would you like to bet on it? The cultivation of novelty for novelty alone - is it typical of our age? Anyway, we soon won't be allowed to use a hose at all.