Madam, – Last week I presented my taxi for the new “suitability test”, a new test, which is in addition to the annual (for taxis) NCT. I was surprised to be told that two faults had been discovered which unless they were rectified rendered my car unsuitable as a taxi.
The first fault was a missing N. This missing N was the second N in my Christian name, Eamonn, and it had been mislaid in the Regulator’s office. This meant that my ordinary driving licence, my taxi driving licence, and my tax clearance certificate all referred to Eamonn Murdock, but the taxi regulators records referred to Eamon Murdock, a dreadful conundrum for sure.
When I protested about the loss of my second N I was told that I could be a “totally different person”. This worried me as I have no desire to be a totally different person and I thought it best not to press the matter. Phone calls were made, a change of name form (usually used by newly married women who have opted to take their husband’s name) was filled out and returned, and after a few days the missing N, or one very similar was located, captured, and returned to keep its more faithful partner company behind the O in my name.
This left the other “fault” which rendered my otherwise perfect Mazda 6 unsuitable. The roof sign, the two yellow sections and the blue “TAXI” section should all be the same size. My offside yellow panel was a full three inches shorter than the nearside yellow and blue Taxi panels.This outrageous state of affairs had pertained for the past 10 years and no one noticed the danger to the travelling public posed by the missing three inches of yellow roof-sign. Money was spent, forms were filled out and now my roofsign is among the best in Dublin. My experience has left me wondering if the lunacy which has seized this country at a macro level is working its way through the system to the micro level. If it is, we are in even more trouble than we realise. – Yours, etc,