Sir, Fintan O'Toole's recent article, in which he referred to the attitude of hospital consultants, had me nodding approvingly in agreement. Most specialists in any field, I have found, tend to have glaringly obvious deficiencies in other areas of their development, due no doubt to their over concentration on one aspect only.
Fintan's other reference to "one of the oldest encounters in human history, that between the fearful, grateful and humble patient and the godlike, awesome doctor, an initiate into sacred mysteries of life and death, is on the way out", brought another nod. But there is still an awful long way to go.
Patients in hospitals are under tremendous psychological disadvantages in their encounters with consultants. Every time I attend hospital, I have to take my trousers off (I envy those fortunate souls with broken arms and battered faces). Thus bereft, and facing a well groomed, immaculately dressed consultant who treats you as if you had no mind as well as no trousers, is simply a no contest situation. Also, there is usually a beautiful young nurse in attendance, adding to the paralysis.
Once, though, after being admitted to hospital to undergo what was euphemistically described as an "exploratory examination" (an aborted attempt to crush my testicles), I made a steely resolve to tackle the consultant when next he was on hiss rounds. I wanted answers, facts, real communication. And, by God I would get them! The night nurse told me the consultant would be making his rounds the next morning. Good! I'd be ready for him.
It is difficult to be authoritative and incisive while lying on one's back, naked, legs raised high, nether regions exposed, and minus one's dentures. Sufficient to say that my steely resolution crumbled. Mute and beaten, I lay there as the godlike, awesome one gazed unseeingly through me, murmured something to his medical retinue, and passed on his way. - Yours, etc.,
Dublin 8.
PS. - I have just remembered that I have to go in for another exploratory examination in two weeks' time. Er, if any of the relevant consultants in the hospital read this, please remember, lads, I'm only joking. Honest.