A chara, - I propose that the bus service of this city be renamed. Henceforth let Dublin's double-deckers and Imps be incorporated as Bus Dubh Linn, with the free translation: "Black Holes of the Black Pool". (Bus being the Irish word for black holes, I have come to believe).
The universe, some physicists tell us, is not a vast emptiness. Instead, it is an awesome mass encapsulating time and matter in a great black pool, as it were. And in this urban corner of the cosmic black pool, the bus system behaves in much the same way as cosmic black holes - the universe must bend to their presence (or in this Irish alternate realm, their lack thereof). Space and time, such as Dublin today, is at the mercy of black holes. Thousands of sentient and frustrated life-forms are sucked into the vortex of their system. Time becomes so profoundly altered, that children grow beards trying to get from one part of the city to another.
It's time we bought the god of this black pool a send-off watch. - Is mise,
Brendan Keane, Kincora Court, Clontarf, Dublin 3.