There is a simple dignity about the little initiation ceremony of a new member of Dail Eireann. The Clerk of the Dail reads aloud the result of the by-election. The new member - in this case Dr Mary Upton - is then escorted down the gangway by the whip of the victorious party and introduced to the Ceann Comhairle, then steered towards the prized vacant seat that usually has been so hard won. The passions of battle have subsided and a more reflective tone prevails.
This week both Bertie Ahern and John Bruton were gracious in their welcoming remarks for the new Labour TD for Dublin South Central. Ruairi Quinn contrived to refer only indirectly to his unique achievement in winning three by-elections in a row in a single parliament. Inevitably, deputies privately remembered not just Pat Upton but also Jim Kemmy and Hugh Coveney. It seems such a short time ago that all three were returned in the general election.
Whatever about the lacklustre campaign and the disturbingly record-low turnout, there was nothing lacklustre about the 28 per cent of the vote achieved by the Labour candidate. As any tallyman will tell you, if Labour can repeat this in the general election, the party will take two seats.
Yet Ruairi Quinn, reflecting on the media coverage of his latest success at the polls, must wonder what will happen to him if he ever loses a by-election.
If one didn't know the actual result, one would be forgiven for thinking some disaster had befallen the party. Emer Woodfull set the grudging tone on Five-Seven Live. It must be disappointing, she thought, to win in such a poor turnout. A remarkably calm victor was told Eric Byrne must be very disappointed that two Labour seats in South Central were so manifestly implausible. When did she last speak to Eric Byrne? Not since the first count, replied the winner patiently.
Election counts are clearly not Ms Woodfull's strong suit. A puzzled Eric Byrne was hauled into her presence to have disappointment poured all over him. Mary Upton has just told us you didn't speak to her today. Byrne protested that was not true but clearly he had not heard the Upton interview.
In between, Ms Woodfull chided Michael Mulcahy for managing to lose a fourth time and asked how disappointed Catherine Byrne must be on winning only 20 per cent of the vote on her first time out. The disappointment in the studio only lifted when it was the turn of the Sinn Fein candidate, who had garnered 1,600-odd votes.
Understanding electoral quotas is also a difficulty for the Parliamentary Correspondent of the Sunday Business Post, whose piece was headlined "Little Comfort for Labour in Election Win". The inference that the task for Labour "to snare two Dail seats" will be made more difficult because "Dublin South Central will be enlarged to a five-seat constituency" boggles the mind.
A leader in the same newspaper contrived not to mention the Labour victory but did note that "in particular Sinn Fein is emerging as a credible fourth-largest party".
The Business Post was the only Sunday paper to miss out on the "When does a loan become a political donation?" story which further rained on the Labour parade. Very mysterious all those banks spewing out their clients' secrets at this time. The unconcealed delight in certain quarters at Labour's embarrassment was heightened by the intervention of Bernie Malone demanding an investigation. In the process she managed to clasp Mary Upton to her anti-merger bosom, boasting that most of her new-found spare time was spent labouring in South Central.
Drapier doesn't know how many people will note that Dick Spring didn't fly to Paris to use the proceeds of the loan to have himself bedecked like Louis XIV. And it is difficult to know how much of a saving grace it is that Spring - no more than Bernard Durkan - didn't move to bankrupt any innocent victims. What can be said for certain is that this is not the way to celebrate a by-election victory and the definite prospect of two Labour seats in Dublin South Central.
Otherwise matters agricultural dominated the agenda. Liz O'Donnell used the launch of the very unspecific "Action Programme for the Millennium" to open a trapdoor underneath John Ellis. Mary Harney slapped down the IFA demand that farmers pay tax at 10 per cent as if they were offshore companies. The evidence adduced before Jim Mitchell's DIRT inquiry would seem to suggest that many farmers are well accustomed to non-resident status.
And then Des O'Malley and Pat Rabbitte teamed up again to bring us the Emerald Meats story in an extraordinary Prime Time expose. I have rarely seen my rural colleagues so shocked by a television programme. With due respect to the track record of Deputies O'Malley and Rabbitte in respect of the beef industry, it was the trenchant findings of the High Court and the Supreme Court that shocked even hard-bitten deputies.
The conduct of the department, presumably with political approval, could scarcely be shown up in a worse light. The reckless waste of taxpayers' money in pointless litigation must surely now be inquired into by the Public Accounts Committee. Why the relentless drive to put a small company out of business; why no effort to recover the proceeds from the beneficiaries of this scam? Would civil servants act in this fashion if they didn't believe they had political cover?
One suspects that the Department of Agriculture in particular will have studied the forthright remarks of Kevin Murphy, the Information Commissioner. Mr Murphy's straightforward assertion that key Government departments are not keeping proper records in an effort to deny the public its right to information can hardly be ignored.
It is also a definite signal of the independence of his office. In instancing "the Department of Finance" having "been shown up at the DIRT inquiry" Mr Murphy, himself a former second secretary at that department, is demonstrating neither fear nor favour.