"I ASK you to stand and toast the President of Finland," said the Taoiseach, John Bruton. The Finns hesitated and eyed their glasses, the Irish looked bemused. They all shuffled to their feet, slowly took their glasses and clinked them together. The glasses contained mineral water.
It was lunchtime in Iveagh House on Wednesday and the Finnish President, Martti Ahtisaari, his foreign minister and a large retinue of officials were being entertained to lunch.
The menu promised common-or-garden Australian Nottage Hill Chardonnay and Nottage Hill Cabernet Sauvignon. But it was nowhere to be seen. It was nowhere to be seen either when, five minutes later, Mr Ahtisaari had everyone shuffling to their feet again to give the Taoiseach a reciprocal watery toast. After everyone took their seats for the serious business of terrine and roast lamb, the wine arrived.
"In Finland," an official from that home of fine vodka remarked gravely, "it is illegal to toast someone with water". He did not seem to be joking.