INDIAN MOTHERS-IN-LAW have formed a union to improve their stereotyped public image as “cruel monsters” who piteously harass their daughters-in-law.
The 500-strong All India Mothers-in-Law Protection Forum, recently constituted in Bangalore, southern India, is planning not only an image makeover for its members but also to lobby through public meetings and its website against stringent dowry laws they claim largely favour daughters-in-law.
“Mothers-in-law are physically-harassed and abused by their daughters-in-law, but the popular perception remains that they are the perpetrators,” Neena Dhulia said. False cases are filed against them and their families and they are left with little or no legal recourse. In television soap operas we are the villains, but in real life we are the victims, Mrs Dhulia bemoaned.
Stringent anti-dowry laws were instituted in the 1980s following thousands of cases of brides being burnt, starved or harassed by greedy in-laws demanding more money and goods. If the families of the unfortunate brides declined to indulge, in-laws – in connivance with the husbands – doused the hapless girl with paraffin and set her alight, claiming she had caught fire while cooking.
Consequently, the onus of proof in all such dowry and wife harassment cases is largely on the husband and his parents.
“This law is often misused by brides who file false complaints either to get out of the marriage or to blackmail their husbands and in-laws,” Mamta Nayak said. There are 15 legal statues favouring daughters-in-law but not a single one in support of us, Mrs Nayak said.
The forum has a long established parallel male organisation – the All India Front Against Atrocities by Wives.“Women are not the only victims of domestic violence. Men too suffer,” said convener and founding member Ram Prasad Chugh. Men, he said, were the weaker sex, not women.
Meanwhile, a special jail wing in New Dehli “dedicated” to mothers-in-law arrested for demanding excessive dowry and breaking up marriages is overcrowded. A jail official said the section housed some 120 mothers-in-law, 40 to 50 more than it was built to accommodate.