I first got to hear about HIV/AIDS in 1986 and for some reason unknown to me at the time, found myself drawn to wanting to know more and more about it. Little did I know that seven years later we would be contending with it as a family.
I am the eldest of a family of 18, 11 girls and seven boys who all lived up to adulthood. The first experience of death in the family was that of our father by Amin's regime. We never saw him die, nor did we see his body. So we did not actually witness death, but a disappearance, a void, and emptiness.
So when my sister's husband was diagnosed with HIV in 1991 it sent shock waves through our family, as we watched him wither away and succumb to AIDS a year later. My sister was to follow the next year. Suddenly the lives of three boys aged eight, four, and 18 months were changed forever, and so was mine. Until then I had been a single woman leading an ordinary life, but overnight I became a single parent. Fortunately the children and I bonded very quickly and now we are a family.
Not all has been easy though - particularly with the older boy who at times is withdrawn. He is not very communicative and has occasional outbursts of anger which he unleashes on his younger brothers. There are times when I wish that he would speak and say what he was thinking. Strangely enough, now that he has become a teenager, he appears to be opening up more and expressing himself better.
Being a single parent is not easy, as any single parent will confess. But the boys have brought such joy to my life, as I have seen them grow. Last summer the little one celebrated his 10th birthday. Even as I have had to look around for school fees and clothes which they seem to outgrow so fast, I am grateful for what the boys have taught me about life.
Since the death of my first sister in 1993, AIDS has claimed four other sisters, the last one being during last summer. I hate AIDS and what it has done to us. With every sister that fell sick we have experienced fear, anxiety, anger, stress and both mental and physical exhaustion.
It is terrible watching a loved one go through pain and knowing that there is little else that one can do but pray. That is one good thing that AIDS has brought - a turning to God in prayer.
As each of my sisters battled with the virus we as a family rallied around them with every resource we had. None of the girls went on the AIDS medication because these were out of our financial reach. Treating all the ailments such as the ulcers, the TB, skin rashes, headaches etc, drained whatever savings we had. Then the funerals took whatever was left.
Thankfully, as AIDS has hit almost every family in Uganda it has drawn people together, so that, families and friends come together to share the heavy burden, especially at funerals. We have experienced such love and comfort from family, relatives and friends during these times.
Life goes on. We are determined to fight HIV/AIDS with whatever it takes. We openly discuss it with the children who already appear to know so much from what they are taught at school. The openness with which Uganda has confronted HIV/AIDS is itself a very powerful weapon.
Win we shall, because we have HOPE!