ASK THE EXPERT:What to do when it sticks out a mile that a Leaving Certificate student is not stuck in, writes DAVID COLEMAN
MY SON just sat his “mocks” for his Leaving Cert. I suppose I should be thankful that he at least turned up for the tests, but he had done no study whatsoever. He seems to think that the mocks were pointless and that he’ll breeze through the real exams. He is bright enough and he says he wants to go to college but I am afraid that unless he puts in the effort he won’t do as well as he expects.
I try to motivate him but he complains that I nag him and laughs that I am more worried about the exams than he is. How can I encourage him to get stuck in for the last few months?
Wow, it is amazing how quickly the exam season rolls around again. I hear many parents complain to me that the lead-up to the State exams is more stressful for them than for their children.
Part of the reason that it is stressful for us is that we invest significant hopes and dreams in our children. We have expectations of them and what they can achieve and it is frustrating (and at times disappointing) when our youngsters don’t share those expectations.
Also, we have no real control over the effort that can be put into realising those dreams and hopes. Certainly by the time the Leaving Cert looms it is really up to your son to be motivating himself. You can’t do the study for him and that means you have no way of acting to reduce your anxieties about his performance.
Perhaps he’s right when he says you are more worried; he isn’t yet worried because his study and, ultimately, his achievement in the exams is within his sphere of control. Maybe he does have a plan and just isn’t telling you.
So rather than focusing on his study or lack of it, I would suggest that you try to get him focused on a goal that makes his Leaving Certificate meaningful.
For example, if he has intentions of “going to college” he might find it more helpful to be clear about what specific course he wants to study. Then he can work out how many points he will require, what results will be needed to achieve this, and what level of study he has to apply to get those results.
If you find that he won’t engage with you about his college plans then get someone else within your extended family, or within the school, whom you know he respects to engage with him about this.
Allow that person to encourage him to focus and plan so that you don’t have to. As long as the right message gets to your son then it doesn’t matter who gives it to him.
Another factor that sometimes leaves even bright students procrastinating is the sense of being overwhelmed by the task at hand. If the amount of study that is needed seems too great it can be tempting to put your head in the sand. Thanks to our fears we won’t achieve it, because we don’t even try.
To combat this inaction, your son needs to develop a bit of forward momentum and have a good plan. He might need help to develop a proper study timetable for the weeks ahead that allow him parcel out the time that is left to make sure he covers all the subjects.
The benefit of this is that he will be able to see that covering all of the work is achievable and as he does each bit, day-by-day he can see his progress building to the final goal and that is rewarding in itself.
This, of course, assumes that your son knows how to study. Ideally he should be using a warm, quiet room with as little distraction as possible and as much natural light as possible.
Our attention span is usually about 15-20 minutes. So each hour of study can be usefully broken up into three blocks of 15 minutes of study, with a five-minute break after each block.
As he reads, he needs to take notes; this increases the likelihood of staying focused on what he is reading and then the notes serve as the text for revision.
When it comes closer to the exams it will be helpful also to practice the past exam papers as this will give him a sense of the structure of the exam and he can get used to the pacing required to make sure he gets to answer all of the questions.
Armed with these practical strategies, your best bet might be to wait, see how he actually does perform in the mocks and, with a bit of luck, a poor performance there might put the bomb under him that he needs to kick-start the study process. Then, like a knight in shining armour, you can pass on your wisdom about how he can study effectively.
- David Coleman is a clinical psychologist and broadcaster with RTÉ television
- Readers' queries are welcome and will be answered through the column, but David Coleman regrets he cannot enter into individual correspondence. Questions should be e-mailed to healthsupplement@irishtimes.com