It may be reassuring for parents to know what is thought to be normal behaviour in a toddler. To adults, a toddler's behaviour can be difficult to understand (especially on a bad day). However if we understand why our little treasure behaves in this way, we are in a better position to find the right way of tackling it.

Toddlers crave attention and do not like being ignored. By fair means or foul, they will get attention any way they can, crying, screaming or having a tantrum if necessary. Toddlers generally hate parents (usually Mummy) to go out of sight. They have no sense of danger and will constantly ask questions.

Impulsive and unpredictable, they tend to leave mountains of mess wherever they happen to be or to go. They are very active little bodies who are extremely sensitive to atmospheres, whether caused by upset, emotion, stress or tension - and will react intensely to them.

Their reactions can take many guises, from bold behaviour to having more accidents if potty-training.

Toddlers love to be the centre of attention and live only for the moment; strong-willed and stubborn, they are determined to get their own way.

On the positive side, they are the most affectionate and cuddlesome loving little ones who LOVE YOU, so very much; you can see the devotion in their eyes. They're always on the go - exploring, experimenting and investigating life constantly.

Yes, toddlers can be a definite challenge! For parents this toddler time is about introducing controls:

guiding gently;

setting limits;

avoiding unnecessary confrontation;

being firm and consistent.

Not forgetting all the new things your toddler has to contend with:

learning to talk properly;

controlling bodily functions day and night;

controlling impulses, emotions and the frustration that comes when they can't make themselves understood or explain what they want properly;

learning how to behave sociably - gathering, for example, that tantrums are not the way to influence people;

changing from being too self-centred to sharing attention, toys etc, and realising others have rights too.

So, to cope with your bundle of energy please be realistic: a toddler will act like a toddler. He or she will be noisy, messy and at times be overwhelmed with emotions. A certain amount of tantrums, breakages and messiness is inevitable.

Be consistent. Don't give conflicting messages - if she can't do it yesterday, then she can't do it today. Stand firm.

Be wise, organise. Toddlers tend to feel much happier and secure in a well structured, organised environment. Keep to a routine as much as possible so they know this is feeding time, this is going to the playgroup time, this is nap time. They just thrive on routine, so give plenty of warning when changes are going to occur.

Beware of trigger factors. When trouble occurs, try to stand back and analyse why your child behaved in a such an anti-social way. Was she tired, hungry, frustrated? Avoid any triggers that you find and ensure you do not have too much activity at vulnerable times.

Remain calm and collected. (Easier said than done, eh?) Remember, you are the adult and you have the power to control. Do not enter into shouting matches or confrontations. Battles with untamed toddlers cannot be won - except by force, and that is not acceptable. (It's not of good teaching value either.)

Arguing over feeding, sleeping or whatever is a waste of time. Calmly set the important limits and calmly, consistently stick to them.

If you feel angry, out of control or your tolerance level is at an all-time low, cut your losses and run. Strap your toddler in the buggy and get out of the home - walk until you feel better or to an open space where your toddler can run safely around and shout to her heart's content.

Keep your sense of humour. We should try to take a look at ourselves and our reactions - we'd laugh at ourselves if we could.

Relax, enjoy your toddler. I know it's embarrassing when she points out a bad hair-do or says "Yuk!" to a gourmet dinner. Such frankness can be hilarious or mortifying.

I wonder, though, if we should all ask ourselves whether it's the toddler's honesty or our adult social dishonesty, at times, that needs changing.