BIKETEST HARLEY-DAVIDSON HERITAGE SOFTAIL CLASSIC:From Blobs to extraordinary gentlemen to Wags and back again, GEOFF HILLhad a a smooth 500 miles, thanks to Harley
AS A man who rode a Road King from Chicago to LA on Route 66, I never fail to be stirred by the sight of a Harley, ready and waiting in the early light – even if, rather than heading to Amarillo in the rising heat, I’m setting off with 999 other masochists to ride 500 miles in aid of the Air Ambulance.
In truth, I’d no one to blame but myself. Two months ago, sitting in the kitchen with a bunch of mates about to set off up the Antrim coast, we realised we didn’t have a name for our gang.
“What about Sons of Santa?”
“That only works for dyslexic journalists,” says Paul, who’s 6ft 6” in all directions. “What about Big Lads on Bikes (Blobs)?”
“Listen,” says Gerry, “I’ve been trying to lose weight for a year, so a Blob is the last thing I want to be. Also, if we walk into a bikers’ caff wearing sweatshirts saying ‘Blobs’, what self-respecting babe will cast admiring glances in our direction? What about the League of Adventurous Gentlemen?”
“Sounds a bit too much like the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen,” says Paddy Minne, world-famous Franco-Belgian motorcycle mechanic, helping himself to another slice of toast.
“What about the League of Extraordinarily Adventurous Blobs?” I said.
“What about Wildly Adventurous Gentlemen (Wags)?” says my wife Cate, passing by.
“The woman’s a genius!” I exclaim. “Wags it is.”
“Aye, except we never do anything more adventurous than ride up the Antrim coast, have a bacon buttie in Carnlough, and ride back,” says Colin.
“Well, we can change that,” I say. “There’s this 500-mile, 1,000-bike ride around Ireland in aid of the Air Ambulance. . .”
I should have kept my mouth shut, I thought, as we rolled into Bangor on Sunday morning to find hundreds of bikers standing by their machines, gazing at the leaden sky with the familiar look of bruised disappointment which proved, not for the first time, that the Irish are a Mediterranean people constantly betrayed by the weather.
Still, at least I had the perfect machine for the job: the traditional and elegant Heritage Softail Classic I’d blagged from Ricky at Provincewide.
“Fairly similar to the Road King, except that instead of the engine being rubber-mounted, it’s rigidly attached to the frame and has counterbalance shafts, so it’s slightly less vibey at idle and low revs, and a slightly more relaxed and less aggressive ride,” was how he put it.
And how right he was: as I rode south through Belfast and onto Balbriggan for the first fuel stop, it became obvious this bike was smoothness personified.
It was a smoothness that started right from easing it into first gear, with a silky clutch and none of the seismic clunk once compulsory with Harleys.
At low revs, that same smoothness (and a stability that belies the fact that this is a bike almost 2.5 metres long and weighing as much as two Yamaha R6s) makes it a doddle to potter around town on.
Put it this way: it’s the first Harley on which I’ve ever done a full circle on full lock.
Not that it’s a slouch – 0-60mph takes less than five seconds, and out on the motorway, it’s only when you hit 90 that the engine becomes slightly vibey.
I eased back to a comfortable 70 and drank in the astonishing sight of bikes as far as I could see, both ahead and behind.
Even better, at Balbriggan, the rain eased off to drizzle.
“Anyone seen Gerry?” said Paddy, as Colin handed around the Werther’s.
“Good question,” I said, hauling out my phone. “Gerry, where are you?”
“I’m back at home,” he said plaintively. “My leather jacket got soaked in the first downpour, and by the time I stopped and got my waterproofs on, I was already wet through.”
“Right, that’s it,” said Paddy. “He’ll have to have his Wag stripes torn off.”
“And his motorbike set on fire,” said Paul.
“And a burning cross on his front lawn, with his jacket draped over it,” said Colin.
Having sorted that out, we set off for Sligo, Ballybofey, Donegal, Derry and Coleraine, a last stop outside Joey Dunlop’s bar in Ballymoney, and home.
I walked through the front door 12 hours after I’d left.
“You must be knackered after that,” said Cate.
“Neck and shoulders are a bit stiff, but otherwise I’m grand. Great bike,” I said, picking up a can of petrol and a lighter and getting back on the Harley to go over to Gerry’s.
For details of the Irish Air Ambulance appeal, visit irelandairambulance.org
Factfile
Engine: 1,584cc in-line V-twin air-cooled twin cam
Torque: 86 ft lb / 117.0 Nm @ 3200 rpm
Transmission: six-speed, carbon fibre belt drive
Weight: 326kg
Fuel capacity: 18.9l
Top speed: 110mph
Price: €21,620-€22,260 Contact Dublin Harley- Davidson on 01-464 2211, dublinharley-davidson.com or Waterford Harley-Davidson on 051-844 200, waterfordharley- davidson. com.
(Test bike, £13,680-£14,120 from Provincewide Harley- Davidson of Antrim, 028-9446 6999, provincewide.com.)