Ailbhe Malonegets smacked in the face by the Big Man when she whips her hair

• TRACK OF THE WEEK:We R Who We R by Ke$ha: Although there are legions of naysayers knocking Kesh (right) for irresponsible tooth-brushing and excessive glitter usage and bemoaning her white-girl, auto-tuned sing/talk-style, we bet they're the same people who've never had a Jägerbomb (don't, btw – they're rank). Either way, while this Ke$ha track isn't going to set the creative world alight, it is pretty amazing nonetheless. PS: It will please all grans to know that she's reppin' for the Big Man, as she sings "got Jesus on my neck-uh-lace-lace".

• The video to Willow Smith's Whip My Hair has finally arrived, and it is ZOMGing incredible. The nine-year-old (right) whips her hair like there is no tomorrow (we hope her neck's okay), while wearing an array of swag-filled clobber, and – oh yeah – there's a hanclap- dance breakdown. And there's a baby dancing in it. And Willow's hair is braided into a 3D heart. Rihanna who? Check it out here: tinyurl.com/loveyouwillow

• Speaking of Ri-Ri ... word on the street is that she's gagging to work with Cheryl Cole. Now that their hair colour matches, we suppose it was only a matter of time. Apazza, Rihanna's had her sights set on Cheryl for a while – ever since she heard Parachutes. Says a mysterious sauce, sorry, source: "She listens to it in her car the whole time. Rihanna really wants to record a track with Cheryl – and already has one in mind that she's convinced she will love."

• N-DUBZ WATCH: It seems that everyone wants a piece of Cheryl. Our fave N-Dub (Tulisa obvs) wants in on the act too. Says Tuls: "We'd make a beat for Cheryl. I've met her a few times. One time I saw her and I went, 'Aw I love you' and she was like, 'Aw I love you too' and we had a little hug." We can only imagine how awesome a Cherl/ Dappy moment would be: "We're gonna fight fight fight fight fight for this Dub."