With two former occupants of the taoiseach's chair releasing their memoirs, DEAGLÁN DE BRÉADÚNexamines the art of the political autobiography
WITHIN A few short weeks of each other, autobiographies by both Albert Reynolds and Bertie Ahern will have been launched. Other members of the AFT (Association of Former Taoisigh) such as Eamon de Valera, John A Costello, Seán Lemass, Jack Lynch, Liam Cosgrave and Charles Haughey never wrote their memoirs: the irrepressible Garret FitzGerald was the sole exception. Perhaps in time John Bruton will publish his life story; no doubt it is the last thing on Brian Cowen’s mind at the moment.
We live in the age of the guideline, when the “correct” approach is set down for just about every human activity but, strangely, there are no guidelines for the art of political autobiography. It is time to remedy that deficiency, and future memoirists might consider the following:
1. DON’T LEAVE IT TOO LATE
Bertie’s timing, as always, is impeccable. It is not much more than a year – though admittedly a tumultuous one – since he vacated the Taoiseach’s office in Government Buildings.
Albert hasn’t been prime minister since November 1994 – that’s 15 years. Public interest in the Reynolds era has faded: there is a new generation which feels it can take the peace process for granted and has never heard of dancehalls, showbands and “send them home sweating”. But the man Charles Haughey dubbed the most skilful and the most cunning of them all has chosen a moment when he is still fresh in the public mind but has not yet been publicly judged by the Mahon tribunal.
2. GET A GOOD LITERARY COLLABORATOR
Unless you are Garret and can write and write . . . and write, everyone will know you didn’t do it on your own, so don’t conceal the identity of your co-author: no ghostwriters, in other words. Thus Albert Reynolds publicly proffers his “thanks to Jill Arlon, for helping me to tell the story of my life so well”. Arlon previously collaborated in the memoirs of Dennis Waterman from the TV series, Minder. Dana, who has had a dual career as a singer and member of the European Parliament, enlisted political correspondent Ken Murray of INN radio news. Ahern recruited the services of prominent UCD academic Richard Aldous.
3. MAKE SURE THEY GIVE YOU A GOOD ADVANCE
With the economy in crisis and pensions (including Bertie's) being cut back, you may very well need the money for your old age. Bill Clinton got $15 million (€10.3 million) upfront for his 2004 autobiography, unoriginally titled My Life.
The Bertie Ahern book deal with a subsidiary of US giant Random House has been variously reported as €360,000 or €400,000-plus; still generous in these recessionary times.
4. PLAY DOWN THE BAD MOMENTS IN YOUR CAREER
Bill Clinton dismissed the two-year Monica Lewinsky relationship in a few curt paragraphs on page 773 and his “revelation” that Hillary made him sleep on the couch for at least two months afterwards was already contained in her own memoirs. The journalists will be disappointed but, when you think about it, what have they have ever done for you? At the same time, you should be suitably contrite and maybe even work up a few tears in interviews. Some might call you cynical, but that’s showbusiness.
5. EXACT REVENGE
Don’t waste the opportunity to exact revenge on your political opponents and even take a swipe at the “meeja” for their “unfair coverage” over the years when you were only trying to do your best in a thankless and demanding task out of selfless, idealistic devotion to the country and its people, and all they wanted to do was focus on your private life and/or your financial affairs, and so on.
6. CONSIDER THE FUTURE
Remember that this book could be the springboard to a new phase in your political career. For example, former taoisigh can go on to become president and there is an election to Áras an Uachtaráin coming up in 2011. Ahern himself has alluded to this, and he also reminded us some months back of the plan to have the mayor of Dublin chosen by universal suffrage. And Barack Obama wrote his memoirs before becoming president of the US.
7. KEEP IT JUICY
A few newsworthy revelations will help the sales. Your cabinet colleagues or some nosy reporters may already have published the juicier stories from behind the scenes but there must still be some fresh data to be brought into public view. In addition, you can give opinions about other public figures that you couldn’t express when you were in office: the minister who tended to panic under pressure or the other guy you “wouldn’t send down to the corner to buy chips”. We already know, for example, that Ahern regarded Gerry Adams as “cross” and “narky” and Peter Mandelson as “a bit stand-offish”.
8. WHET THE PUBLIC APPETITE
Make a lucrative deal in advance for the serialisation: the Sunday newspapers are usually the best place to look. It also helps to whet the public appetite for the moment your tome actually hits the shelves. Extracts from the Ahern and Reynolds books have appeared in the Sunday Timesand Sunday Independent.
9. GET THE LAUNCH RIGHT
Get the right person to launch the darn thing. The current Taoiseach – who else? – did the honours for Reynolds. Cowen was Albert’s protege and the Longfordman gave him his first cabinet post as minister for labour in 1992. Although he gave one of his better speeches, the event took place in the late evening when many media outlets had passed their deadlines.
The irrepressible Charlie McCreevy will launch Bertie’s book in the Mansion House on Thursday and can be relied upon to make some newsworthy if perhaps indiscreet or undiplomatic remarks that will be picked up by reporters. It’s timed for 6pm, so that should get the 9pm news, all the radio stations and, of course, the next morning’s newspapers. In line with Bertie’s penchant for pressing the flesh there will be a publicity blitz of chat-shows, bookstore signings and even an appearance at the Cheltenham Literary Festival, where he will be interviewed by legendary Downing Street spin-doctor Alastair Campbell.
10. REMEMBER WILL ROGERS
Finally, remember the Will Rogers rule. The homespun American humorist deserves a wider audience on this side of the Atlantic: he defined an autobiography as, “When you put down the good things you ought to have done and leave out the bad ones you did do.”
- Deaglán de Bréadún is Political Correspondent of The Irish Times
