Meet IRIS, a high-tech military motorbike with enough artillery to stage a large coup, which becomes sentient when its struck by lightning. Determined to visit a motor show in "Scottsberg, Indiana", IRIS goes on the run, dragging her mechanic, Pablo, as hostage. IRIS is pursued by the motorcycle SPIKE, appropriately voiced by Terminator 2's Robert Patrick. LocoCycle is a shooter-cum-racer, much like retro arcade favourites Chase HQ and Spy Hunter. The pace is relentless, as IRIS avoids various assailants and fires her own artillery, while occasionally whipping enemies with poor Pablo. Yes, the live-action cut scenes are too long and very silly; yes, Pablo's subtitled dialogue is hard to read amidst the mayhem, and IRIS is too similar to GLaDOS from Portal. But LocoCycle is part of a fun subgenre that's mostly forgotten. Despite its flaws, it's an unpretentious, distinctive game with energy and goofy charm.