The usually dour Belgians combined with Irish accuracy this week to achieve what most of the world would dearly like to do, put egg on the face of Microsoft geek Bill Gates. The dollar billionaire lovin' machine was pelted with custard pies, emerging with goo-smeared glasses, but otherwise unscathed. It could start a new trend. Dermot Desmond, Michael Smurfit, Charles Haughey and Brian Cowen would be high on anyone's hit list. Bill reportedly did not appreciate the humour. Perhaps he'll understand this one? Gates, his chief hardware engineer and head management honcho, were driving through the Alps to the Davos meeting. On a steep mountain road the brakes failed, the car careered out of control but miraculously slid to a halt at the edge of a precipice. "I know," said the hardware guru. "I've got a Swiss army knife, I can strip down the braking system, isolate the fault, fix it and we're on our way."

"No," said the manager, "let's schedule some meetings, propose a vision statement, define achievable goals, and then get the hell out of here." "Just a moment," said Gates, "shouldn't we first push the car back to the top of the mountain and see if it happens again?"